Readers' Submissions

My Thailand Story Part 1

  • Written by Ant
  • October 12th, 2004
  • 5 min read

Not having seen my stepfather, who had been living in Thailand for a good few years, I, having recently been devastated by the break-up of my relationship with my girlfriend of four and a half years, decided to come to Thailand for a holiday.

I hadn’t had a holiday for almost ten years and looked forward to it immensely. My stepfather was skeptical when I called him and said I was coming to see him and was surprised to say the least when I told him my flight was booked.

I arrived in Thailand at the beginning of August 1999 to be greeted by the “Welcome to the Land of Smiles” sign in the airport terminal. I didn’t see many people smiling but never thought much of it! My stepfather, who, at the time, was working in the oil industry here, met me at the airport with his driver.

Well, there followed the most amazing 12 days. The driver, Tawatchai, took me everywhere. I would do the tourist thing and he would patiently wait for me to return. I visited all the main sights of course and I truly enjoyed myself.

One evening, I was in my stepfather’s apartment on Sukhumvit 39, when he said, “I suppose I’d better take you to Patpong then. Hadn’t I?” Being completely naïve, I didn’t know what he meant, but of course I said yes. Tawatchai, who always seemed to be waiting/sleeping in the car was informed of our destination and we proceeded to Patpong.

We had a look around, (I think you can all remember how you felt the first time you went to Patpong). I’d never seen anything like it. We went into a bar and I was dumbstruck by the beauty of the girl, who actually wanted to talk to me! She asked for a drink, which I was only to eager to purchase while my stepfather admonished me, saying I’d be a danger to myself if left alone!

Well, to my dismay we left the bar and, being accosted by card waving Thai guys advertising “ping-pong” shows and “no-cover charge”, we found ourselves sitting upstairs in Pussy Galore (sound familiar?). We watched some girls dancing around for a bit, then left. It had, however, left a big impression on me.

Of course, the next night I made my excuses and went alone. I went straight to Patpong and made a beeline for Pussy Galore. Upon entering, I sat down and was immediately assailed by four girls. I naturally bought them all drinks whilst one, I’m trying but I can’t remember her name, was cleaning my tonsils with her tongue. The others were massaging various parts of my anatomy and, generally, it appeared that a good time was being had by all.

Suddenly (and I know this will sound familiar), there she was! Standing at my feet doing the cutest wai I’d ever seen! (Course I hadn’t seen many but you now exactly what I mean.) I grabbed her hand and, to the chagrin of the other ladies, I shoed them away. This slight girl sat next to me all night and did all the things that she was supposed to (nothing lewd I hasten to add), including making me fall in love with her. If Stickman will allow it and to implicate the innocent, I will tell you her name was Beer. (Does that sound familiar?)

Anyway, I stayed in Pussy Galore until throwing out time and left, paying 400 Baht for a tuk-tuk back to Sukhumvit 39.

The next day, we left for Pattaya. My stepfather has a house there and the intention was that I would stay there for the remaining 5 days of my holiday. Well, guess what? I couldn’t stop thinking about Patpong and Beer and, after a couple of days in Pattaya, I announced that I was returning to Bangkok before leaving for England the following Saturday. I left with the sound of my stepfather saying “You’re stupid to get mixed up with a bargirl!” ringing in my ears, but, of course, I didn’t listen.

Tawatchai drove me back to Bangkok and, although I know you can guess the rest, I’ll tell you anyway. I went to P.G. and bar-fined Beer. We ate at that Thai restaurant under P.G. and returned to the apartment. That night we slept together. I won’t bore you with the gory details, but she did seem a little stiff, which I took to mean that sleeping with guys wasn’t (???) something she did on a regular basis. Duh.

Saturday came around way too quickly and Beer accompanied me to the airport with Tawatchai. I must add here that I had told my stepfather my intention of coming back soon and trying to do something here, to which he replied that there was nothing here and I should stay in England. I gave Beer the rest of the Thai cash in my wallet (ooh familiarity again), I had already given Beer several thousand Baht, and I returned to cold, wet Manchester Airport.

Stepping out of the airport convinced me that there was nothing else for it but to get back to Thailand as soon as possible, preferably without making any plans whatsoever about what I would do when I got there. It wasn’t important. I’ve never had any problems finding work in the past so I was convinced I’d be able to make a go of it.

I proceeded to sell all my treasured possessions including my collection of (beloved) books, my (equally loved) car and motorbike and anything else, which I deemed not necessary for my new life in Thailand. I did, however, purchase a 300 quid suit (the most expensive item of clothing I’d ever bought), before I left.

Thus armed with a couple of hundred thousand Baht, my CD collection and a seriously good-looking suit, I returned to Thailand two weeks later.

Stickman's thoughts:

My stupid comments to follow in few days…..very busy!