Stickman Readers' Submissions June 12th, 2004

Random Thoughts Of Pattaya


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Aye Mates! Thought I'd pass along my thoughts since I've just recently (9 June, 2004) returned from Pattaya. So let's begin:

1. Found that I liked SOI 6; 13/4?; and Tony's the most. Seemed to be less fellas out that's for sure and that was good. Only time it got busy was when the Yanks showed up. They are a good bunch the lot and I actually sat down and drank more than a few pints with them over the past month. SOI 6 is definately the place to go for short time. Nice thing about this SOI is the girls are outside so you can see how they look before you even go in. Price is cheap too, relatively. SOI 13/4 I think has some great bars too although I can't remember all of their names. I do remember Classroom though. Seems like every girl in there got barfined before the end of the night..and I mean every girl on just about every night! For the balding American guy who brought his fiance in there since they were leaving for the states, you know who you are. Your bird was wearing a skirt and you had a reputation for doing other girls in there..well as she motioned me to the bathroom while you were flirting with the other dancers and let me just make a prediction: Your marriage may last as long as J-Lo's! Nuff Said. Tony's is a nice place but man, drinks are expensive!

2. Closing time of 2am seemed to be enforced at all the major places. Even some of the after hours places, wouldn't open more often than not because of the boys in brown. So much for Thailand getting more of my hard earned money cause the more I drink the more I spend!

3. I have to admit now that I do understand when people say the service is horrible sometimes in Thailand restruants. The Vientienne is a perfect example; padded bills, slooooow service, orders not showing up, orders mixed up, waitresses scratching their backside while writing down your order only to mess it up anyway (why bother). Normally I'd just choose another place to eat but when you like the food I guess you just have to either accept piss-poor service or move on. I'd finally had enough after the 3rd time eating there when I was the first customer for dinner and sat there for 20 min waiting for someone to take my order.

4. Most bizarre incident took place late one night when I saw a guy actually jerking off on the side of the road. No, not on the side of the road like on Beach Front road, but Second Road. Sitting in the front seat for all to see at 1 am. He looked Middle Eastern so I guess those "torture" pics of Abu Gharib prison maybe weren't all that terrible. (Send your hate e-mail somewhere else)

5. Found a nice beer bar with wildly beautiful young women in it on Second Road. Atlantic something, right accross from the big white massage parlor that's on the right hand side of the street. These birds were very very attractive and I couldn't help but to be a butterfly there.

6. There was one after hours bar right off walking street that I did see, and it was packed virtually every night. Go almost all the way down and on the left (follow the loud music) was a beer-bar type called JP I think. Lots of women there, 25% were good looking (at 7am), probably only 30% had HIV. Met a real "nice" girl there who spoke English with an English accent. Said she'd only been in England 3 mo, broke up with boyfriend etc etc. Showed me her passport and she'd been a real world traveler..and thats the places I could read since she'd obviously washed her passport. Ya, she was real honest. I watched her walk off with some guy 3X her age and weight.

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7. Tried to get my pic with a small monkey but she wouldn't let me cause I wanted the snake lady to add her prop to the pic too. My goal was to get a pic of the monkey actually inside the snake but I just couldn't explain in Thai good enough at 1 am, drunk what I wanted. Oh well, I kept my 200 Baht.

Look forward to making another trip in Oct, this time to Chaing Mai. Just wish I could write as poetically as Dana…

Stickman's thoughts:

You wanna be like Dana?!

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