Oldies
By P
It is not uncommon to read letters from your readers that, explicitly or implicitly, are disparaging of older men who participate in Bangkok’s nightlife. I’d like to say some things in praise of the older farangs.
First, the confession. I am in the my 50’s, have lived in Bangkok for almost 5 years, have a respectable job here, and – here comes the confession – am a regular participant on the 33-Cowboy-Nana circuit. I probably go out to these areas about 5 times a week, and return home with ladies on 2 or 3 of these nights, generally short-time.
My question: What is so wrong with this? It certainly seems that some of your readers think it is foolish, unnatural, or perhaps immature. I beg to differ. All my post-puberty life I have enjoyed the company of attractive ladies and have wanted to bed many of them, although until the past 5 years this rarely happened. Most guys in Bangkok of my age and who have a penchant for the nightlife have, one way or another, lost their wives along the way. We still enjoy sex and the company of ladies, which seems utterly natural to me. And here in Bangkok it is imminently available. Isn’t it wonderful! To have such opportunities at this age and stage is something I never deemed possible – but here it is.
Sometimes I think that the younger guys writing their disparaging words have a bit of envy regarding the amount of money the oldies have at their disposal. Like anything, though, one must play one’s strong suit. They have their youth, we have our money, and these competitive advantages often cancel each other out.
I must admit to snickering when I see some old bloke dottering onto a plane to Phuket with some young thing. But, what the hell. The girl is not going against her will, and the old guy is having the time of his life. I try to be reasonably discrete in my nightlife antics, shunning public places for the most part. But if the old guy wants to take a hired babe to Phuket, why not? One could raise moral issues here, but they would apply to guys of all ages, not just the old ones.
Having said all this, let me also say that I agree wholeheartedly with you when it comes to the wisdom (or lack thereof) of those who marry the bargirls. But this, too, is true regardless of the guy’s age. I also agree that it is usually foolish for one to marry a person who is much younger. But, who’s talking about marriage? Certainly not I. It is imperative to treat the girls with respect, and to be fair with them in terms of money, BUT don’t take them too seriously.
My own interest in the nightlife tends to wax and wane, seemingly based largely on recent experiences. I have suffered the typical disappointments and the occasional attempts of the girls to manipulate, lie, cheat, and so forth. But, I have also known several really decent human beings among the girls, and we often remain on good terms even when our sex time has passed. I also occasionally do things that I regret the next day, almost always caused by too much booze. But these instances have become fewer and farther between over time, thank God.
I shudder when I think of what I would be doing in my home country at this age and stage. Extremely boring. Here in Bangkok it is possible to have a full life, even in the late 50’s. I would like someone to tell me why this is so wrong for the oldies, but is okay for the younger guys.
Stickman’s thoughts:
Fair enough.
