A Goof Thai Girl – Helen’s Story
Some time ago I wrote an article for the Stick site 'what Thai girls want'. Firstly, huge thanks to the many, many people who contacted me with feedback and words of encouragement. Believe it or not, I am still in touch with some of the people who initially contacted me, it's great to hear their experiences too. It has been interesting reading people's feedback. It certainly helps to know that the time spent writing the article wasn't wasted and the article itself seems to have been useful to many people. So thanks and sorry it's taken so long for the follow up article, which I also hope you find interesting!
Opinions on the previous article were a little divided. There were two main camps, the 1) Treat them mean to keep them keen they will cheat on you anyway brigade 2) and those that were a little less cynical! However, the main gist of that article was to point out there is a lot more to getting a Thai girl's attention than just looking good. To be fair it should be pointed out that following the advice in the previous article does not provide a written guarantee that your Thai girl will not mess about, give you grief and generally mess up your life! In the long run she probably will, but my philosophy is if you are in a relationship you should give it your best, until such time as you find the relationship is not panning out as you'd hoped and it is time to call it a day – as quickly and cleanly as possible. At least then you know that you've held up your side of things and can hold you head up high. And who knows, with the next girl you might hit pay dirt.
As with my previous article I will state for the record I am no expert on women or even on matters related to Thailand, but I pass on my experiences, as they may be useful for others.
In my previous article I also alluded to a type of Thai girl that could be even more "dangerous" that the infamous "Thai bar girl" – but hinted that I would explain in a subsequent article…well here it is! All is revealed! In a nutshell the type of Thai girl who I consider could be more "dangerous" than a bar girl is a 'normal' Thai girl!!!
Don't believe me? Think I have taken leave of my senses? Well I will relate to you a story about a work colleague of my ex-fiance (a Thai girl). Let's call the subject of this story Helen.
Helen worked for an international company, and had a good job there in the finance department. On the face of it she was a respectable young (age 27) Chinese-Thai lady, working hard and making her way in the world. She was also extremely pleasant on the eye, with an incredible figure…slim, but amply rounded and beautifully proportioned…unlike a lot of Thai girls who have a "straight" figure. Helen had curves in all the right places. But, as Stick mentioned in his excellent weekly article "Thai girls and the chamber of secrets" there is usually more to a Thai girl than meets the eye and Helen was no exception.
The first thing to say about Helen was she had a lot of boyfriends…and I don't mean one after the other…I mean at the same time! By a lot I mean 5 or 6. How she managed this is beyond me. Not only did she have a lot at the same time…she got through them quicker than you could imagine! Most of these guys were Thai, but there was also the odd smattering of farangs in there too. At one point she was living (at weekends at least) with a Dutch bloke, who gave her the boot for treating him like a walking ATM – apparently the final straw came when he was taking Helen on holiday and she wanted her "friend" to come along too – although this poor guy was expected to pay for her friend too. Apparently Helen "cried a lot" when he said goodbye…but he didn't change his mind (good for him).
Many (most??) single Thai girls seem to have A PRIME DIRECTIVE…this directive is to get married and have several kids. But with Helen it couldn't just be any old man …it had to be a farang. Why? Because 1) farangs are rich 2) she liked the look and bodies of farangs (don't ask!) 3) She wanted to leave Thailand because she didn't like it and she was bored with it 4) Thai man "no good".
[start cynical mode]
Let us just take a few moments to reflect in silence at the fate of that poor unfortunate specimen the Thai man. God my heart bleeds for them…why I hear you ask? Because they have to try and build a meaningful relationship with Thai women – not easy! In fact, many don't seem to bother and just try to **** as many of them as possible! In some ways I don't blame them.
[end cynical mode]
One other quirk with Helen was the fact that she needed money! Why? She had a good job. Unfortunately, Helen liked to gamble and by all accounts she wasn't very good at it. The only thing Helen got was a "very, very big debt". So Helen's "plan" (Thai girls have a lot of "plan") was to find a rich farang who would be generous to her and give her money…and well…if they got married too that would be what we call in the UK "a result".
So where would Helen go to find these poor, unsuspecting farang on which to prey…Starbucks of course! Me: "Why Starbucks?" My ex: "Because farang's like it!". It turned out that basically Helen would carefully target "farang haunts", certain hotels and locations like Starbucks. She would home in on guys who were good looking and also looked well off (yes in my first article I said looks didn't matter too much!!!). Helen would then strike up an innocuous conversation and then what followed was, in the words of my ex, "up to them". The implication was that although she wasn't strictly "sleeping with guys for money", she could "wangle" some financial gain (or at least as much as she could get), either short term or long term.
Anyone wanting Helen's email now? Hmm…remember this is not a bar girl – this is a girl with a good job.
Well..if that doesn't have you scurrying off to the relative sanctuary of the Patpong bars..let me tell you about Helen's Italian "boyfriend" (who lives in Parma). I've tried to contact this poor guy through Stick's site, but no joy yet. He is oblivious to the reality of this girl. Helen met her Italian b/f on ICQ (alarm bells ringing anyone?)…yes ICQ…that great online game of "hunt the farang" (kinda like whack-a-mole). He fell in love with her ample charms. She told him she loved him, he believed her. Fair enough. However, all the while this "relationship" was going on Helen was getting through Thai b/fs like they were going out of fashion. As well as that (Helen was always a busy girl) she was fixing up dates through ICQ with Bangkok based farangs and they were wining and dining (and no doubt bedding) this obliging young lady. Anyway, she went to have a holiday with her b/f in Italy for a couple of weeks (a rest??) and no sooner was she back, then she was back into action with her various BKK based b/fs. When I asked Helen for her verdict on Venice, she said: "oh yes…that place have a lot of rivers". The relationship with her Italian b/f continued. Then the guy started to send her gifts, then the money started coming, there was talk of marriage. Helen's latest "acquisition" meanwhile in BKK was a holidaying Australian sheep farmer! (Please note, I hold nothing against Australians, sheep or farmers but I can't say the same for Helen! )
At time of submitting this article Helen is still "full on" with her Italian b/f – they text each other once a day.
So what conclusions can we draw from Helen's somewhat sordid tale? Hmmm, it did make me think I must have had a very sheltered upbringing!
We can't say all Thai girls are like Helen. Let me restate that for the record, just so I am clear…(coughs, clears throat) NOT ALL THAI GIRLS ARE THE SAME AS HELEN. But I think the story should make us aware that we should have our wits about us in our dealings with girls in Thailand. Please don't judge girls by their looks. To look at Helen you would think that butter wouldn't melt in her mouth – please feel free to insert smutty comment of your choice at this point – I couldn't be bothered 😉 . She is all sweetness and light, but the reality is VERY different. This should at least provide a heads-up to guys about to embark on some relationship with a Thai girl.
So why did I say that the normal Thai girl can be more dangerous than a BG. Well, simply because with a BG you know where you stand – it is pure and simply a business transaction at its core. Some might make more of it, but at least everyone's cards are on the table, both parties are aware of the others agenda. For the BG the issue is money, for the guy the issue is sex. Simple as that.
I would like to summarize by stating clearly again that NOT ALL THAI GIRLS ARE THE SAME. I just wanted to warn you guys that there are some "good Thai girls" out there whose history (or even present day) may not be as wholesome as you would like. You have been warned.
In my next (and probably final) article for Stick's site, I plan to relate my own story of my relationship with a Thai girl that took place via the Internet, in England and in Thailand over a period of 19 months.
Not all Thai girls are the same, but there are many Helens out there. As someone who used to play "the internet game", I saw a lot of Helens. Thais refer to these sort of people as "gigs", pronounced with a hard G and not a J. Next time you meet a Helen, mention this word to her and watch her face drop!