Stickman Readers' Submissions January 29th, 2004

Fag Hag Fodder

I've never considered myself to be in any way sexist or chauvinistic. When you finish reading this submission you will probably disagree with that and indeed, as a civilised human being, I too now doubt that view.

I wonder how many female Farangs read this site? I ‘m about to find out I guess. If you've never been to Bangkok, it’s gogo bars and in particular, it’s ping pong establishments, you may be forgiven for thinking they are a male preserve and not a woman to be seen (excepting the performers, of course). Well, you'd be wrong. There are always Farang/Farang couples to be found in these hallowed premises, not necessarily the sexually liberated kind but normal, regular guys and girls that are usually stopping over on the Europe/Ausralasia routes, who find themselves wandering in Patpong during their short stay and curiosity got the better of them. Perhaps they are here for a longer stay. Now, for me, the ping pong bars are just a step too far in adult entertainment and the girls are sometimes rather monstrous (IMHO). You'll also find these regular Joe’s and their Farang lasses in the ordinary gogo bars (there's a contradiction in terms if I ever wrote one). I just love observing these folk, trying to read their minds and it always makes me smile. There they are, perched uncomfortably on their seats feeling like the whole world is watching them and this ‘sworded’ scene they've found themselves in, nursing their drinks and wondering if the glasses are safe to drink from. The guy will be agog at the tanned lovelies parading in front of him with nothing more than a few brightly coloured strings to cover their heavenly parts. Hell be cross legged sometimes in an attempt to hide his erection. Hell be making a half hearted conversation with his spouse but will have a far away look on his face as he contemplates what he never thought he would ever contemplate….a sworded liaison with a hooker. He cannot believe that now he has come to this place with the woman that he thought he loved, he somehow wishes he'd come alone. (sceptical?….you know I’m right). His Farang girlfriend will be laughing and trying to see it as a brief foray into the legendary bar scene they'd heard so much about. She will comment upon ‘how disgusting’ it all is….’how degrading’ to these poor girls, when secretly, she has noticed a subtle but tangible shift in her boyfriend’s aura…..even football doesn’t grab his attention like this does, she thinks to herself. She begins to wonder how she can compete with the sexy little bodies they are witnessing. She jokingly asks her boyfriend ‘So which one do you want, darling’ and they both laugh but he starts to make a theoretical choice…..and she knows it. She’s regretting already suggesting that they just pop in to have a look and knows that he's wondering what it would be like. The gogo girls themselves, when they're not dancing, may even try and get a drink bought for them by this couple. They'll sit and chat for a while and being the tactile creatures that they are, will venture a hand onto the mans leg in full view of his girlfriend. Her blood boils but outwardly she's smiling and pretending to look the other way.

He Clinic Bangkok

I wonder how many times this has been the seed to a broken relationship and the aforementioned male has found himself here in Thailand minus his farang girlfriend to sample the ‘culture’. There is no doubt that it has an erotic pull that many of us have to fulfil. I think it has as much to do with Thailand as it does the girls. I used to live in Hong Kong where nearly all of the gogo girls in the notorious Wan Chai district are Thai (and some Filipinos) yet I didn’t find the same erotic attraction. It seemed all rather bland in Hong Kong (and astronomically expensive).

Now, I’m sure there are some of you who will, or have in the past, considered yourselves to be a ‘New man’, where you encourage and respect equality between you and your female counterpart….and I’m all for that…but genes are genes and you cannot hide the fact that you sometimes long for a woman that is ever so slightly submissive, one that can make you feel that you are in control without losing her equality, one that can make you feel that you are her night in shining armour, one that will fulfil your sexual desires without complaining she has a headache, and when she performs it will be an unselfish act……is this why we like Thai women so much?

I’m about to make a ridiculous theory……and it is only made as a joke so don’t write to me to criticise it…….Could the female Farang be extinct within a few generations? As more and more male Farangs take Thai wives and have their dreams fulfilled, will word spread and the amount of these marriages rise exponentially to a point where farang Women just don’t have a hope of holding onto a farang Male……and I’m not just talking about looks here. Personally, I’m utterly sick to death of Western women and their attitudes to, well, just about everything. I know this has been said many times but I’m hoping some of you girls will be reading this……..

CBD bangkok

In London, everybody calls everybody ‘sweetheart’. It is a friendly term of endearment that is completely harmless. You will hear a man in a British pub say to the barmaid ‘I’ll have a pint of Guinness please sweetheart’…..harmless and friendly. However, I once found myself in a bar, in the town of Nelson, New Zealand. I approached the bar and said with a smile ‘I’ll have a pint of Speights please sweetheart’. The barmaid looked at me like I was a piece of shit and refused to serve me. Furthermore, she had a word with one of the bouncers and had me removed from the bar….and as I was being led away in astonishment, it was explained to me that the barmaid took exception to me calling her sweetheart. I have never been thrown out of a bar in my life and to have this done to me by a woman that I have never met and clearly had a serious attitude problem, was the straw that broke the camels back. I have no problem with women in positions of power but I have a big problem with women who pull stunts like this. It was humiliating and I didn’t deserve it.

Whilst trawling the net, I sometimes happen upon discussion forums run by Western women living in Thailand. They are invariably filled with these women moaning and groaning about how us stupid testosterone filled guys are obsessed with Thai women and how there is, apparently, no substitute for a sexy farang girl…. A kind of group therapy for expatriate women, saying ‘don’t worry girls, were great, despite what these stupid guys think’.

Believe it or not, I do have a bit of sympathy for you Western girls in Thailand (but not much). It must be hard for you with your pasty white skin, bad attitudes and a general feeling of being a square peg in a round hole…….

This goes out to all you Farang girls……

wonderland clinic

When I was younger, for many years I had to put up with you drooling over some muscle clad Adonis in the office or on a poster. You would drone on continuously with your friends about a hunky Greek or Italian guy you met while on one of your shag holidays in the Mediteranian. You made us guys back home feel inferior somehow with your love of Dark skinned European men.

…..and now, in Thailand, I have to endure your whining about how us guys are obsessed with these little lovelies known as Thai girls. I balk at your jealousy towards the fact that us guys are having a great time with some girls that really get us hot. I even heard one Farang lady say with a smug voice ‘Well, I think Thai women age more quickly than us Western girls’…..what crap. Why don’t you just admit that you're jealous and can’t stand it now that YOU are the ones with the inferiority complex and you've brought it upon yourselves with your feminist ways……..In summary, fuck off, fat ass.

Stickman says:

I really do not know what to make of this…

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