Stickman Readers' Submissions January 26th, 2004

Crazy Girls

I never thought I’d take up a bar girl as a girlfriend, or any Thai girl for that matter.

But if there is any weakness in your heart, any chink in your armor, chances are eventually you will fall for one if you chase them around long enough.

He Clinic Bangkok

It’s as if they have cast a spell on you, because I swore up and down that I would never date a bar girl, I’ve befriended a few but never intended on taking one as a serious girlfriend.

Well it happened to me, a gogo girl in fact. I know a lot of the get these girls are bad fucking news, the ones I am friends with confide in me about how many boyfriends they have and how much money they send them. What I noticed is a lot of the girls are actually looking for a permanent partner and though they have two boyfriends they're waiting to see which one will guarantee them financial and emotional security, pretty much waiting to see who is the real deal. Can’t blame them, they've had their hearts broken by Thai men and farangs alike; of course they won't trust a man 100%.

My first time to Pattaya I was seeing a bar girl regularly, she was a gogo girl from walking street. I wasn't in Pattaya on vacation but I was there on a 1 1/2 month deployment for exercise Cobra Gold. The greatest deployment ever conceived by any military strategist. We were stationed on a Thai marine base only 30 minutes from Pattaya. It was a fucking vacation, that's what it was.

CBD bangkok

Well I grew tired of this girl and tried to break it off with her, over the telephone as to avoid any physical or violent retaliation. She took it quite well, or so I thought.

Later that evening I’m already in bed with a new girl. Only this girl is not a bar girl, she was a masseuse that worked at one of those legit foot massages you see along the street. Yeah so I bagged one of those girls. We’re lying in bed when my hotel telephone rings. Who could that be? It’s my friend and he is telling me that my ex bar girl companion is in his hotel room crying her eyes out. Apparently he had seen her crying in the lobby of the hotel and invited her to his room to try to console her.

But what resulted was a tense and violent situation. Of course I never witnessed it, thank god, but from eyewitness accounts I believe she began screaming and cursing my name, throwing ash trays and beer bottles out of the window, and yeah, after that I started receiving the phone calls from my friend.

Fuck them; it's their own goddamn fault for letting her up in to his room. I told that girl that I wasn't in love with her, I told her not to expect any kind of relationship. But still I should have known better. What really pissed me off was she was doing my laundry for me while I was there and she had one load sitting at her apartment.

wonderland clinic

I began to receive extremely disturbing text messages on my cell phone, almost every ten to twenty minutes, for a good two days. They were usually death threats and nasty grams, or threats of penile dismemberment, but in between were messages like 'I love you', I miss you. I was really concerned for possibly my life and possibly her own well being. She already had scars on her wrists from a previous suicide attempt. So what do I do? The insensitive bastard who has no idea how to handle these types of situations (think Larry David); I finally reply to her messages and ask her if I could have my laundry back. Oh my god, the plethora of hostile messages that followed.

All in all I think everything went well, I made it out of Thailand alive, and I never saw her again.

Or did I? I just recently returned from a trip to Pattaya and was having a drink at the gogo bar she worked at, I had not seen her there so I assumed she must not work there anymore. A girl who resembled her poked me in the back and gave me a devilish grin, you know, it could've been her but maybe not. All I know is this girl who I don't really recognize seems to know me. If it was her she must have changed her appearance, she had longer hair this time, whatever, I don't know.

Does that happen to many of you guys? Not the psycho bar girl shit, but girls who seem to know you but you have no idea who they are. That happens to me at least three or for times every time I go to Pattaya. Some woman will walk up to me and say hello, or stop me on the street to hug me. We’ll have a stop and chat and I’ll have no fucking clue that she is.

I guess I’m becoming notorious around there. Time to find a new city to hang out in.

And what about the massage therapist, what ever the fuck you call them. Well of course this girl gets all hung up on me and starts asking me things "you not forget me?" during intercourse, which just kills the mood. So what do I do? The only possible thing a jerk like me can do, I forget about her.

Three months later I receive a package in the mail, I had given her my mailing address, and it was from this girl and it was a birthday present. How shitty did I feel?

What can I say, there is only so much of me to go around. No but really, I feel terrible about this to this day. I decided to email her last month to see how she is doing, she no longer works at the massage parlor but at a beer bar. God I hope I had nothing to do with that. Who am I kidding, I’m going to hell.

Oh yeah, the reason I wrote this article! So I’ve got a Thai girlfriend now, a gogo girl, who apparently has ceased work.

Another bargirl friend of mine has recently told me that my girlfriend is two timing me with a DJ at a gogo bar. Now, I don't support this girl financially in any way, so I’m sure she is already lying about not working in the bars. But the Thai boyfriend thing kind of pissed me off. So I call my girlfriend to confront her about this, of course she denies it and starts crying, very convincingly. I mean, if these weren't real tears then this girl deserves an academy award. Well we left that issue unresolved. I decided to tell this comical tale to another bar girl who I’m friends with. This is where it gets weird, I wrote an article on this site about a bar girl who is stalking me, well she just calls me in the middle of the night and hangs up. This bar girl tells me that I was being lied to by the other bar girl about my girlfriend, so that my would be stalker/not so secret admirer would have better chances of becoming my girlfriend. I didn't confuse anybody did I?

Ok it's like this

BG#1 tells me that my girlfriend is fucking around on me.

BG#2 tells me it's all a trick and BG#1 whose friend likes me, is trying to sabotage my relationship.

I used to think I had wild stories from being in the military and growing up during high school or from college. But the stories from Thailand seem to be the most interesting ones that you tell to your friends and strangers alike.

I found all of this to be very disturbing. All this for me? I don't know who to believe, I don't think I really care either. This is all too strange for even me. On the positive side at least it's good to know that my life isn't boring.

Stickman says:

There are a few crazy girls out there so be careful.

nana plaza