Stickman Readers' Submissions November 20th, 2003

That Look – Don’t You Just Love Them?

After a recent reader's submission I just felt that I had change my status from being an avid lurker for the past two years.

A brief introduction to put you in the picture. My taste in ladies is to have them young but legal and I believe that the age of consent here is over 18? This is before they become completely disillusioned by so many bad experiences. I just love the way they walk so proud, holding the hand of a falang in his late fifties (me) and completely ignoring the looks of everybody else. I like to treat them with my utmost respect and try to give them a good time. Hopefully they may remember that all punters are not the same, More in Part II and Part III where I write about my current gogo dancer flatmate!

He Clinic Bangkok

Over the past 18 months Thailand has been a real eye opener for me and I have been fortunate that I have had very few bad experiences but I will not omit them since I have learned yet a little more about Thailand. After an English Executive Job Placement Course I have learnt to be the preferred animal that employees like one to emulate, the observant eagle that soars above the rest.

So here goes for no apparent reason but in chronological order.

It was my first night in Bangkok (after a three year stay in Malaysia and frequent motor cycle trips/visa runs to the Thai border towns of Hat Yai, Betong (hence the nick name of John Betong) and Sungai Golok, enough to fill my 40 page passport). My friend took me to a Pat Pong Gogo bar and there I was between two lovely young ladies trying to decide. Fortunately I picked the one that I shall always fondly remember. It was that look that I shall never forget, she had only been working there for two days but had been working in other bars for a couple of months.

CBD bangkok

I will always remember being with my lady at the roof top swimming baths near Bang Na. We went with her mother and young brother. After buying a wad of tickets then getting changed into our swimming gear; she discovered that another ticket was required for a locker. I tried to reason but still she insisted on getting more money and marching off. After about 10 yards she suddenly stopped and spun round with the expression that I will never forget. In that brief determined walk she had realised that no locker key was required because her mother was not swimming and would be able to look after our valuables.

That day there was a slight cooling breeze but the 4 year old brother was waist deep in the pool with his arms tight against his chest, fists clenched near his mouth and he was shivering with his teeth chattering so hard that I thought they may break! I just thought it was very warm, no wonder us farangs sweat so much!

Consoling her when she was crying (only once in three months) because of a heated telephone conversation with her blood sucking fat sister who wanted money to spend on whisky and cigarettes.

The night we stayed at her parent’s house and watched one of the petite sister-in-law's walking slowly and caring on her fat eldest brother's back.

wonderland clinic

The next morning when we were to return to Bangkok and she burst into the only toilet / bathroom, stripped off and proceeding to shower with me while the rest of the family (over a dozen) waited outside for their turn.

Following her on the motorcycle taxi that she reckoned would get her to her punter on time because the metered taxi we had from Pinklao took over 15 minutes just to get to Khao Sarn Road in the tea-time rush hour traffic. We kept passing each other on the way to Patpong and she would give me the most gorgeous smile that I learnt to love so much.

When we arrived I watched her in the little black dress clutching her handbag while she waited on the pavement at the entrance to the enormous hotel at the Suriwong end of Patpong. She was waiting for an old customer that paid her 8,000 baht for a short time! How could I refuse to let her earn that kind of money! She reckoned that he did not bonk her and this reminded me of my friend telling of Thais that only tell us what they think we should know!

Immediately after she finished she went to redeem her gold necklace from a Patpong pawn shop. That is why they all want gold, it is not as easy to spend but always there as a last resort.

My first visa run to Cambodia. It was in her fat sister's brother's pickup. Having paid about 3,000 baht for his time and petrol then to be told in the morning that I had to pay another 250 baht taxi ride to his house to meet him. This was so he did not have to drive about an hour into Bangkok to pick me us up, drive back and pass his house on the way to Cambodia. I was not a happy bunny and let them all know it!

Running the gauntlet of amputees begging on Cambodian border. It was nearly as bad as India and that takes some beating!

My comment about trying to get back before it got dark because it was dangerous driving at night went unheeded. We had detoured to a Thailand beauty spot for a swim. After skidding on the wet road I reminded them that it was more dangerous at night because of the reduced visibility. The driver took this as a personal insult of his driving. Both the look on him and her sister was priceless, they were furious!

Reading and replying to her young 24 year old falang boyfriend's emails, she was 19. He promised to marry her, eventually did and I sincerely hope that she is happy living with him in a different country. Both a friend of mine and I agree that she has more than sufficient character to make a go of it because she is one very special lady! Where have I heard that before:)

Watching that beautiful expression that magically appeared on her face when the handle on the five litre water container broke. It dropped on the ground floor of our apartment entrance doorway.

Bonking together while her fiancé telephoned from abroad and she was declaring her never ending love! I was just a customer but she had someone special waiting for her.

Following her after she finished her work in the Patpong massage parlour. I decided that I could not pay her the 2,000 baht / day that she wanted! I followed at a very safe distance in case one of her pimps saw us together! She reckoned that if they saw us and I did not pay their commission then we were in very big trouble. I learnt later that for a 1,000 baht bonk, the massage parlour got 500 baht, the pimp 200 or 300 baht and she could keep the rest!

Once again the expression on her face when I mentioned that I had had the normal Thai and oil massages but enquired about what was a soapy massage. We then went to the nearest 7-11 and she purchased armfuls of soapy stuff then we went back to The Diana Inn, our Pattaya hotel. I then had my first memorable soapy massage by this beautiful lady in our hotel bath.

Seeing her stopping on the way back from Patpong to our apartment on the motorcycle taxis. It was to check her ATM to see if the fiancé had sent her the money for the Thai marriage, visa, translation fees, etc. It had arrived and next day the very early trip to MBK Shopping Mall to buy her new Nokia for over 14,000 baht. Then seeing the expression on her face when we saw the same telephone in Makro for about 3,000 baht cheaper!

The look on her face when I gave her the Palmy VCD that I had bought earlier in Makro. I had just finished copying it onto my computer and was playing it. She kept looking at the VCD in her hand then watching the computer playing the music then watching the VCD in her hand again. The expression was priceless while she wondered what kind of magic I had performed.

The very proud look when she showed me the present of the framed commemorative Thai money that she had bought for her fiancé and his father.

The telephone call I received from her while I was at work! She met her fiancé off the 'plane the previous night and I did not expect her to return to our apartment in the morning. Unfortunately the previous night I “pay bar” for another Patpong lady and left her in bed while I went to work. Afterwards she told me what annoyed her most was that “she was not beautiful – she have short hair”! The lady she found in bed is now my current Patpong gogo girl flatmate!

After her fiancé returned home and having dinner with her, chaperone and my friend in Patpong. She mentioned when I finished my drink, “I always finish first”. And once again that special priceless look when I replied that I had always waited for her to “finish” first! Thankfully I have lost the pre in the premature ejaculation stakes and have learnt how to wait for the lady to finish first.

Being faithful after she got married and returning to the apartment to pick up her clothes; chaperoned with her young sister. That special quizzical look after I gave her 3,000 baht as a wedding present. Sod it, I still like her and will never forget her, she is one special lady.

And finally or as one guy mentioned somewhere on the ‘net that “you never lose your lady, you only lose your turn”! I have my fingers crossed and check her email even though she has changed her password from 999999999 to 123456789!

This is the email I received from her after asking how life was like living with her husband in his country. Names changed since I do not like XXXX substitutions.


hello john

fuck you. I give my mail for jimmy ead. him know about my work because I tell to him, him understand me. I don't like you send e mail for me because I marry with him. and I don't want have problem with him. because I love him to much. I hope you understand me. not send again.

you mad.


Part II to follow soon about the quest to find a replacement and Part III of my current Pat Pong gogo flatmate and her punters!

Stickman says:

We all have our own set of crazy memories of Thailand. It is never to dull read someone else's.

nana plaza