Stickman Readers' Submissions September 25th, 2003

Travails With A Movie Star

By Greg

Before you get too excited the Movie Star (MS) isn't actually a movie star but an ex-Pattaya blow job artist who with a little help with her clothing has somehow managed to transform herself into an utterly stunning creature. 26 going on about 14, thanks to my insistence on zero make-up and the slightness of her frame and a lovely disposition despite servicing the dregs of humanity in Pattaya. Incidentally, she refuses to give me a blow-job, something to do with such degradation (in the mind of Thais) being reserved for work. No great loss to me as I have always been suspicious of such sex since a friend almost had his cock bitten off by one vixen when she was disturbed by a loud bang.

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Since attaching herself to me three months ago she hasn’t worked, save for receiving a stipend from some ancient German (abroad) who I recently managed to see off, in one of those amusing face-off situations. The fiscal implications of this haven’t quite worked through yet, other than a movement from her cheap Pattaya apartment to my new rented Bangkok gig (expensive as in a 150 dollars a month) and the usual promise to “take care” of her, which could mean anything from paying for her 20 baht a session local food to funding the purchase of a 100 rai of Chaiyaphum rice land for her extended family (in her mind, not mine!).

Being nearer 50 than 40, sex once or twice a day is more than sufficient (tender Oriental flesh even in a mind bending package is old, as in twenty years in SE Asia, hat), though the one thing that really freaks the MS is anal sex, even a well lubed (pussy juices) finger sends her into a rant and I’ve only managed to get the member in an inch or two before she literally threw me off her body, quite a feat given that she weighs only 42 kg against my 69 kg. She has promised full penetration as a birthday treat and I am stocking up on the KY Jelly and Viagra in anticipation (haven’t used Vitamin V yet, so should be interesting) of taking the last piece of virgin territory on her body.

Resentment and rage don’t seem to be any part of her nature (even against her mother who sold her at a young age or her father who disappeared as soon as the pregnancy was announced) and she has a disturbing tendency to revert to the sudden, wild enthusiasms of a fourteen year-old (she has both passport and ID card so I am pretty sure she is really 26). – hence I have seen my aged bones subjected to bowling, ice-skating and tennis. Fortunately, I managed to thrash her at bowling despite never playing before, avoided falling on my ass whilst ice-walking unlike she who went flying (somehow my fault despite being a good yard away from her) and exhausted her playing tennis in the extreme Bangkok heat.

She is hyper competitive and immersed in the concept of Thainess (in which it is impossible for farang to win!) so there will be no easy escape from such excursions – BTW bowling is actually a pretty good form of exercise despite its reputation as a haunt of the mediocre that has to be avoided by ageing hipsters. So far I have managed to steer her away from the roller skating in Seacon Square but fear it is only a matter of time until she finds it.

Back in the UK I would probably have to count myself lucky if I was able to pull some 80 kg forty year-old dear with a troupe of kids to support so it comes as no surprise that many farang men try to give the MS the eye but it is the first time I’ve seen Thai men go ape – a couple of them sporting wild, wolf-red, burning eyes that looked about ready to pop out of their heads on the back of the lust whist the baboon grins threatened to break their jaws. Neither the MS nor I have any tolerance for infidelity (ignoring working girl’s ethics and rich ancient Germans for the moment) so we usually end up having a good laugh at these losers attempts to intrude into our state of happiness.

Thai girls, whether bargirls or straight, seem by and large totally amoral when it comes to fidelity, needing a host of men on the go at the same time whether they are married or not. The only way to suss what is really happening is to keep the gal within sight at all times and make sure she has no surplus cash to give to any locals – I would suggest a minimum of a year of this kinda of abuse is needed before even thinking about marriage. Yes it is nothing more than abuse but it is absolutely the only way farang will ever suss what is really going down in the girl’s life. Mad and extreme, most girls long gone, but at least the nice girls will know that you are not butterflying and trade that off against the restrictions! Luckily, and god knows why, the MS is actually even more possessive than myself!

One consequence of having the MS in my life is that I have become totally bored with the neon scene, although I have taken her to some bars where friends of various ex-girlfriends work just to give them two fingers for their past abuse of yours truly. One amusing moment was taking her into the pre-op katoey bar in Patpong where I had a brief fling with one of the (female) waitresses. Alone, I usually had to fight off a steady procession of crazed katoeys… this time around they completely ignored me and flocked around the MS who was totally non-plussed to find herself the centre of attention of a pack of huge gender benders and, for once, rendered speechless. I took that momentary silence to tell the katoeys that she was from Vietnam and didn’t speak any English (she definitely has Vietnamese eyes).

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Her evident disinterest in the creatures and inability to communicate with them soon saw them off, though not before a couple had to adjust their knickers – the sight of such a stunning creature in their midst caused them to forget they were supposed to be women of the third type, their cocks unfurling from where they had been artfully tucked up between the cheeks of their arse. God knows what would’ve happened to the MS if she had entered without an escort. She later accused me of being gay for dragging her into such a dive but protestations of finding men very ugly and doubting that my member would even function in such a situation saved me from a real grilling. She later had a good laugh with her friends about me passing her off as Vietnamese – if you really want to piss off Thai ladies tell them they look Laotian.

Another time I jerked my thumb in the direction of a gay bar on Patpong Two, she poked her head in the direction thinking it was another girlie go-go bar and quickly leapt back to my side when she realized what was going down. The gay-boy tout on the bar stool outside almost dislocated her arm trying to pull her into the bar but we managed to topple him off his perch and do a runner. Some Thais don’t have a sense of humour…

The MS abhors violence of any kind. Even being in a bar with a couple of drunken louts who were arguing with each other a couple of tables away resulted in a demand to fast exit – most Thai gals I know would be getting all exited at receiving a good view of the action. Being a quiet man who only resorts to violence to defend himself is probably part of my appeal; even drunk I never cause any problems. I am also far gone on her but she has already worked out, that as a twenty year veteran of the scene (and still happily unmarried and disease free, thank you very much), I will still walk out on her, whatever the emotional disintegration, if she does the dirty – the upside for her is that I don’t (and, indeed, never have when in a proper relationship) butterfly.

The MS’s friend view our relationship in different ways. A couple go as far as saying we look right together while others can’t understand why she is hanging out with a much older guy who doesn’t appear to have much dosh and cast the mantra of fast cash at her. Part of it is I caught her when she was sick and tired of the bar scene – incidentally, it took me a year of serious bar-hopping to meet her (I spent a damn sight more on beer and sex than I am currently spending her, BTW, but still only loose change having offloaded my UK business a few years ago and basically live on the interest on the interest of the capital!) and I normally would have dismissed her for various reasons (she didn’t look as utterly stunning as she does now, BTW) but she sort of enveloped me with her niceness and I couldn’t quite bring myself to let her go back to the bar scene.

She was probably at that moment in her life when she could quite easily have gone hardcore and seemed rather shocked when I suggested that if she wanted to hang out with me ninety-five percent of her wardrobe would have to be dumped (not wanting to walk around with someone who was basically advertising their availability for paid sex) but, I suppose, flattered that I wanted her to be Thai hundred percent – most modern Thai girls would doubtless have told me where to get off. The other thing that got her, I think (I would never presume to KNOW what is going down in a Thai girl’s mind), was I kept telling her she was far too good for the bar scene (much to the annoyance of her regular customers, a couple of whom she pointed out stalking around outside her apartment from time to time) but she does genuinely seem to be happy in her transformed state – but three months is nothing and no doubt some surprises are in store for me in the future! Meanwhile, I will just have to try to enjoy myself – damn hard work!

Stickman says:

I'm not sure if this sounds enjoyable or not.

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