Good Girls On The Net Part 2
I was surprised how many emails I received from my story Good Girls On The Net. Many letters were just a few lines saying it was good to hear a positive story and wishing me well for the future and then there were a few long letters with very helpful advice and suggestions about my relationship with Kay. If it were not for this good advice from guys who were married to Thais I would not be writing part two of this story and I would not have had the greatest experience of my life when I had returned to see Kay in August. If you have not read part one of this story, it might be best to that first. (Good Girls On The Net. 2/7/03)
Here is a recap of Part One:
I used an online pen pal site to make friends with some good girls before visiting BKK for the first time in June of this year. I developed a close friendship with Kay, she was 29 years old and worked in an office. Kay was well educated, her English was very good. Kay was honest and trustworthy, she had proved this to me many times. I was really looking for the full deal – friendship, love, marriage and children. Kay had never had a boyfriend before and as unbelievable as it sounds she had never been kissed by a guy either. To me, Kay was very beautiful, slim and tall and with perfect complexion. She had a great personality and she was so much fun to be with, I had fallen in love with her. When I asked Kay to marry me she turned me down because I had been previously married and she thought that a guy who had been divorced was a failure.
After returning home to New Zealand, Kay and I continued writing to each other, as well as having weekly phone calls. Our friendship grew stronger and we became even closer. I was able to show her how unreasonable her thinking about a divorced man was. With the advice I received I realized that I had been trying to rush things with Kay and that really the Internet is just a quick way to get an introduction. You still had to do the hard yards so to speak of normal dating and getting to know someone face to face.
I decided to surprise Kay with a visit on her birthday in August, my birthday was just a few days later and I thought it would be a perfect time to see her again. I had been writing to Kay's best friend Mo, and so I enlisted her help to organize my surprise. My plan was simple, just turn up at her office with a big bunch of flowers and some gifts. Now, surprise visits can either go very well or horribly wrong, well this one was sort of in between.
I got into BKK late Sunday night. The next morning I call Mo first, she tells me that Kay is away until the next day. Kay and her two sisters decided on Sunday that they would take a couple of days off and go out of the city and go camping at one of the national parks.
BUGGER! What do I do now?
I called Kay on her cell phone to wish her happy birthday and she asked me where I was calling from and so I told her I was in BKK to see her on her birthday, she was so surprised and excited, my ears felt as if they would burst from her screams. She said she would be back home tomorrow afternoon. The next day I went to see Kay at 3.00pm, she was all smiles and very happy to see me……not nervous at all……after only a few minutes of being together it was just as if I had never left back in June. We had met outside her apartment, as usual she did not want to take me to her room as she would be afraid of what her neighbours might think. This day was a public holiday so we went back to her office so that I could give her the gifts that I had brought her, no one else was there. I had lots of little gifts for her but the best were a jewelry box, an expensive heart shaped gold locket and an evening dress, which Mo helped me choose. (Kiwis can be romantic sometimes, don't you think?) Kay loved her presents, we just talked and talked for hours, we then went to have dinner with Mo, we had a great time, the girls were a lot of fun.
The next day is a day that I will never forget, it is one of the best days of my life, so unexpected and so unplanned (for my part that is). Late in the afternoon I took a taxi over to see Kay at her work, two of her work mates were there and once again they welcomed me. It wasn't long before Kay and I were alone and as usual we would have long talks. It was 6.00pm and we decided to go for a walk and find a place to have dinner. We actually ended up walking quite far, we were looking at houses and gardens and we crossed a river canal bridge and made our way to some shops and found a good place to eat. During our meal Kay brought up the subject of gogo bars and she told me she had heard about Patpong Road and she asked me if I had been there, I said no I hadn't and so this is how our conversation went.
(K is for Kay, J is for me)
K – Lets go to Patpong.
J- What!… why do you want to go there.
K – I'm curious, I want to know what it is like.
J – What do think is there.
K – Go Go bars.
J – From what I have read there is a lot more there than just go go bars.
K – Like what.
J – Shows.
K – What sort of shows.
J – (blushing and whispering) Sex shows.
K – What do they do.
J – I can't tell you, it's too embarrassing, your an innocent girl, you shouldn't know these things.
K – I don't want to be innocent anymore.
J – Yes you do, that's what good about you.
K – I'm 30 already and I want to start having some fun.
J – Yes, but there are better places to have fun.
K – Please take me I want to go.
J – Well there is a night market there, we could just look at that, but I must warn you that you will not like Patpong.
K – That's ok, I want to see for myself.
So we head of across the city and 45 minutes later we are at Patpong. The place is just teaming with people. We walk along and guys would just come up to you and shove some porno DVDs in your face…..wanna buy, give good price. Another couple of steps and another guy shows me a card listing what the girls do in the shows, I quickly glance at it and walk on. Kay asked me what it said….. another few steps and another card is shoved in my face, this time I tell Kay to read it for herself.
Ping pong, razor blades, smoking, shooting arrows, coke cans…plus about ten other things that I cannot remember.
K – what does this all mean.
J – I will tell you later.
We buy a few T-shirts from one of the stalls.
K – What dose that word mean on that sign.
J – What word.
K – Pussy.
J – (whispering in her ear) what is between a woman's legs.
I stop to have a look inside one of the Go Go Bars, I get a slap on the back…
K – just keep walking Mr. James.
At the end of the short street I stop and tell Kay what the list of things on the card meant. I tell her they are tricks that the girls do with their private parts and they do this on stage in front of an audience. I asked her what she now thought of Patpong, she said, this is a very bad place, we have to leave now.
So we get a taxi back to my hotel and I ask Kay if she would like to see the video that I had taken of my place, She agreed. After the video we sat on the bed, I put my arm around her and said, can I kiss you Kay. She looked up at me and gave me a little nod of her head and a little smile. We laid back on the bed and I gave her a sweet little kiss. This was Kay's very first kiss from a guy, very hard to believe that a 30 year old had never been kissed before, but it is true. I don't know how much more I should tell you guys, I don't want it to sound like you're at the pub with your mates and one of the guys is telling a story about a girl he picked up the night before because this is very different. Ah! ok, I'll tell you a little… (I hope Kay doesn't read this)
We just enjoyed the moment in each others arms and continued kissing. Kay asked if she was doing it right and yes she was wonderful, so hard to believe that she was such a good kisser after only just a few minutes of practice. Up until that point I had only ever thought we would go as far as this, I knew that she had been brought up to save herself until her wedding night and I was fully prepared that this is all that I would ever get until there was a ring on her finger. As Kay laid in my arms she started playing with the little bit of chest hair that was poking up through the top of my shirt….. she said, I want to see more of this hair, so she undid a couple of buttons and slipped her hand under my shirt. She played with my chest hair and then moved her hand across until she found a nipple and played with that for a while and then across to the other nipple. Kay asked, do you have hair all the way down to you waist….. a little…. can I see…. she undid my shirt and massaged my chest and stomach and then she did something that I did not expect, she slipped her hand under my trousers and started to feel around.
K – Where is it.
J – My arm is covering it.
K – I want to see it.
J – No, no, you can't. (of course I was teasing)
K – Please, please let me see it.
J – Why do you want to see it.
K – I have never seen one before, I want to know what it looks like.
J – No, no you're not allowed.
K – Please, please, (she starts biting my arm)
J – Ok, ok you can.
I moved my arm and Kay found it, her eyes widened.
K – why is it so big.
J – that's what is suppose to be like.
Well for the next 15 minutes I was poked and prodded and asked so many questions. She just put her head on my chest and looked and looked at it and played with it and giggled with such a delight. I said to her that she was like a kid with a new toy, this put her into fits of laughter. Enough of this….. I start kissing her again, this time even more passionately. After a few minutes Kay whispered in my ear…. do you want to make love?
J – Yes I do, but are you sure about this.
K – Yes I am sure, I want to very much, do you have a condom.
J – Yes I do.
K – Why you have condom.
J – Well actually they are from my last trip, I was not sure if it would happen, so I thought it would be best to have some just in case.
But then Kay said something that totally floored me.
K – James I don't want you to use a condom.
J – We can't do that you could get pregnant.
K – I know that's what I want the most is to have a baby.
J – You're joking, right.
K – No, I do want us to try and have a baby.
J – Hang on a minute, so when did you first decide that you would ask me this.
K – I have been thinking about it since you called me on Monday.
J – Are you sure about this have you thought it through.
K – Yes I have.
J – Isn't this going against the way that you have been brought up, what would your Sisters and mother say if you got pregnant.
K – They would be angry with me and with you also.
J – Yeah they would skin me alive!
K – No they would do nothing to you.
K – Please James, I have been wanting to have a baby for many years now, I am 30 already and I only have a short time left to be able to start a family.
J – But wouldn't this be doing things in the wrong order, you're supposes to fall in love, get engaged, get married and then have children.
K – Yes I know that is what your supposed to do but I can not wait any longer.
(Bloody oath! Kay's biological clock must have been in overdrive)
Well what followed was a very long conversation of the implications of us having a baby would bring. All pros and cons were discussed. In the end I decided that this is what I really wanted, to be with Kay and have a family. I was really basing my decision on how things are back in New Zealand, these days 1/3 of all babies are born to unmarried parents and most people don't care if you're married or not. If I just stopped and gave some thought to how things are in Thailand I would have realized how stupid it was to do this, but Kay seemed to have clearly thought about it. (oh no she hadn't and neither had I.).. Now most of you guys will think that I am a bloody idiot for saying yes to Kay. And looking back at it all now I would agree…a damn0 bloody stupid thing to do. Man! what was I thinking, or more to the point, I was not thinking at all because I should have realized that Kay, even at 30 years old did not have the maturity to make such an important decision on starting a family. It really was just a spur of the moment thing and for me I'm going to blame my momentary lapse of clear thinking on all those mad passionate desires that filled my head at the time……….Ok, so we decided to try for a baby, I knew there would be consequences for this decision, especially with Kay's older sister. And maybe I'd be on the receiving end of a kick boxing lesson sometime in the future.
For the next 5 days we spent every minute we could together. I can truly say that it was the most romantic passionate loving and fun time of my life and for Kay as well. This was definitely the first time for Kay, she was a virgin, I won't go into details about that. What happened that night and the following days for Kay can best be described as a "Sexual Awakening", I taught her everything I knew, and then some!!, she was so keen to learn. I was really just following her lead, I guess Kay had many years to make up for. Kay also taught me many things, I have never been with a woman who put in so much hard physical action into her love making as Kay did, she would just grind herself into me and body slam me knocking the wind out of me and her screams and moans were just so loud and I mean REALLY LOUD!
On the Friday morning I said to Kay, why don't you have a sickie and don't go into work…. it took a while to talk her round to this…. she called her boss and told him….. he was not very happy. 30 minutes later he calls back and tells her to go to the doctor and then asks if she can come into work for a few hours. Dam!….we get to her work at 1.00pm, the boss has already gone home and left Kay a pile of work on her desk, but to our good fortune the power is off and the other workers have left for the day. The air-con is off and office feels like an oven, I crash into a chair but Kay wants to sit on my lap….we have some fun. Just then Kay hears the main office door opening, I have never seen a person jump so high and so fast, fortunately we still have our clothes on… well most of them, I quickly shove Kay's little black lacey knickers into my pocket..ha! ha!
In walks Kay's boss, he says hello….he can see that I am hot and sweaty and apologizes for the air-con not being on. He says to Kay that she does not look well and that she should go home. I quickly offer to take her home. We get a taxi back to Sukhumvit, we are in a traffic jam for an hour, we don't care, we fall asleep. We end up at The Londoner Pub have a few games of pool and an early dinner at 5.00pm, then back to the Hotel…. made love many times.
On Saturday morning Kay just said to me… I just want you inside me for as long as you can…… sure I'll give it a go, I looked at the bedside clock , it was 6.00am. hmm! what followed was just amazing, Kay just held me inside her, she had such powerful pc muscles and then she would do something that I had never experienced before, she would send these little ripple movements up and down inside her…I was in heaven!…. Well I can't believe how long we stayed like that…4 hours and 15 minutes later she let me go…man o man this girl is one in a million. We just crashed into bed and slept for a few more hours, we had not had any food now for what ended up being 20 hours, we only had water, this is true, I can't even believe it myself. We were starving and we needed eat now. Kay also did not bring a change of clothes with her so she wanted to find a road side stall and buy something. We stumbled out of the hotel…. I was in no fit state to go wandering around looking for clothes…. damn, do you think we could find a stall….We decide to go to Central Chidlom…. I can't walk anymore, we get a taxi and only travel a 150 meters to Asoke Train Station…. the driver thinks were nuts. 35 baht well spent I say. But oh! no!, will I be able to climb the stairs up to the Sky Train. We get off at Chidlom shopping complex…..we need to eat, we get to the food court, damn the place is full and there is a queue waiting for tables to be free…. we head downstairs to try another place….bugger!, the same all full no spare tables.
Kay wants to buy a dress, I follow her around…. I'm paying…. she's a good girl and does not want to buy anything expensive…. after 10 minutes I say….don't worry about the price I don't care how much it costs….she chooses a lovely dress… 3000 baht…. she tries it on, my eyes light up… she looks absolutely stunning, she tells the sale assistant she wants to wear it… when no ones looking she gives me a wonderful thank you kiss… hmm!… I love this girl. Finally we get out of the shopping complex and at last we find a restaurant….it's an oasis, air-con set low… Kay orders for us… thankfully the service is quick….we stuff ourselves stupid…after, we almost fall asleep at the table….it's 2.00pm, dam, I want to see the All Black and Wallaby Rugby Test…. it starts in 30 minutes…. Kay were do you want to go to see this game, The Londoner or go back to the hotel….. she says abruptly..HOTEL!
We get back in time, switch on the TV, the Haka has started, Kay is stunned by the expressions on the All Blacks faces…. she also likes their thighs, she has never seen men's legs so big. Kay if you want to become a Kiwi, you will have to love this game….. I give her a crash course on how this game is played…. she asks stupid questions like.. why is the ball not round…. she sees George Gregan get monstered in a tackle by two guys….will he survive that she asks…. hope not, we want him out of the world cup in October… dam he gets up. Kay is loving this game she is a fast learner, that should be the only requirement to get a New Zealand Citizenship. It's half time and Kay starts kissing me…..she says, lets make love again…. no, no Kay it's sacrilege for a Kiwi to do this in the middle of a live rugby test, if it was a repeat then it might be ok……Kay does not listen, she won't leave me alone….how can I refuse her …… yeah!, get your priorities right James I hear you all say…..hmm! I still have not seen that second half… who won that game?… ha! ha! I love this girl, she's mine, I'm the luckiest guy alive.
We sleep some more and at 6.00pm Kay decides to turn on her cell phone….she has a heap of messages from her sisters…. Kay starts to panic… what should I tell them, they will want to know why I haven't called… I quickly think.. just say that your battery was dead and you have only just bought a new one today. She calls her sisters….. hmm!, she can be a good liar when she needs to be. The sisters say that they will be at her room in an hours time….Kay forgot it was Saturday evening and this is the time that the 3 sisters usually spent together at Kay's room. Now she really was in a panic…. I have to go now she says and I can't stay with you tonight. I ask if I can go with her and meet her older sister May… she says no, but I'm persistent….. Ok you can, but you will have to ask May's permission to be allowed to go to my room and you must never say that I have been with you these past few days.
This was the first time I had met May, I knew I had to make a good impression as she was the older sister, the matriarch of the family here in BKK….. I waited in the foyer for May and Jo to arrive… they were not expecting me….. when they finally arrived they were surprised to see me, Jo introduced me to May…. I asked May's permission if I could join them in Kay's room… May is a bit of a teaser and she hummed and hared a bit, I gave her one of my good smiles, she smiled back and said do you like Thai food?….. Well for the next 3 hours I had such a fantastic time with the three sisters, they were very close and it was great to be accepted by them. May asked me so many questions, about New Zealand, my views on religion, politics and marriage and of course my current finances and what I owned etc……and the big question of what I thought about the dowry and how much I might pay for a good wife. Kay had already told me that May's husband, who is a well off Thai businessman, had paid 200,000 baht, so I answered…oh!, maybe somewhere around 200,000 baht. So all in all I made a very good impression with May.
It was Sunday, my last day in BKK….Kay and I certainly made the most of our time left together…..I was certainly going to sleep very well on the flight home. What an amazing time I had with Kay, she had given herself totally and with no inhibitions. It amazed me how a woman who was a virgin was able to be such a fantastic lover and instinctively knew how to please and be pleased right from our very first kiss. I now know why they say that Thai Women are the best lovers in the world.
An update – 5 days after returning home, Kay phoned to tell me that she got her period, she was disappointed but also relieved because she had second thoughts and she was putting herself through some bad guilt trips over wanting to get pregnant before marriage. Kay told me to keep this secret to ourselves and not tell anyone. I almost made the biggest mistake of my life and let something slip in a conversation on the phone with Kay's best friend Mo and when I later told Kay that Mo might know something all hell broke loose, Kay was beside herself, she sobbed uncontrollably at the thought that her best friend might know her secret… she said how can I be friends with her now, I can never see her again. I was on the phone for two hours trying to calm her down. As it turned out Mo did not hear what I had said, fortunately her English is not so good and there was a lot of back round noise on her phone. Kay was so relieved that her secret was intact. She told me that if I ever tell any of her friends she would finish with me. I had my first lesson on what can happen when a Thai girl looses face, big time!
But there is something I do not understand, if she got so upset with just one of her friends knowing then how the hell would she have got on with a bun in the oven for all to see. There is something not right here, I have yet to figure it out. Perhaps she is just a crazy girl who was doing the usual Thai way of only thinking ahead one day at a time. Kay did later tell me that if she had become pregnant she new that I would marry her straight away.
Mo has been a great help to me, I write to her once a week and she explains things to me on what to do and how to think when in a relationship with a Thai girl. It's incredible the amount of differences there are and there are so many things that are just unsaid. Mo has told me how important it is that I understand Kay. She also told me that one of greatest and most significant things I can do for Kay is to offer her some money to help support her each month. When I told Kay I wanted to do this for her she was very pleased with my gesture and then we talked about how much I would send each month. I started with the amount of 5000 baht, Kay started at 1000, we finally agreed at 3000
So were to from now – Well we have decided to do things in the proper order now, I will be returning in October and we will become engaged. Then early next year in the summer, Kay will be spending 3 months with me in New Zealand and then back to Thailand to get married. Most of the dowry I will be giving will be used to rebuild her mother's home, (somewhere 500km north of BKK) Kay's brother in-law and I will be doing the work, that should be fun!, how did I get talked into this…. actually it was my suggestion, you see her mother was suppose to use the dowry from the older sister's wedding to fix up the house but her mum loves to play cards and gamble and as soon as the wedding was over all the villagers turned up at her place to play cards and the money was all gone within a few weeks. I told Kay that I would expect the dowry I'd give to be used wisely.
I need some help with a few questions.
1. I am wanting to bring Kay to NZ on a Sponsored 3 Months Visitors Visa, have any Kiwi's had problems with NZ Immigration with this type of Visa?
2. If Kay had of become pregnant what sort of typical reaction would I have got from her family, I'm thinking maybe a gunshot wedding and a 2 million baht dowry?… ha! ha!
3. If for what ever reason I were to loose face with Kay's family, how would this reflect on Kay?
Thanks again to all you guys that wrote to me, I'll give you another update at the end of October.
I am going to pen a letter to the Prime Minister of New Zealand right away insisting that your passport is revoked. Choosing to go to the hotel ahead of choosing to watch an All Blacks match – how can you call yourself a Kiwi?! Hhehehe.
On the subject of the dowry….I am in favour of it when it is done the traditional way, that is, the money is returned to you to be used for the couple. I don't want to say something negative after such a wonderful story, but the money should be used for the two of you, not the mother…. Anyway, you're happy, and that is what counts.