Addiction – First Step

It was April 2001 as a good friend of mine, Lu, schlepped me to LOS. I wasn't really into to go to Thailand and I moaned the well known word like: "Ahhhhhhh, no. Only Sex tourists go there, blablabla". But at the end of the day he got me down and I agreed to go.

So the big day arrived. Lu was already in Bangers and he wrote me an email with the address of the guesthouse (somewhere in Teewet) where we should met. So I stood at the airport, no clue where to go. Gave the paper to the giggling airport bus-ladies, paid the usual 100 bath and left. They kicked me out at Khao San (….. sorry sir, bus go back airport) and I felt like an 5 year old who lost his mom in a Shopping Mall. Compared to the city where I am come from (still the largest in my country) BKK was HUGE (alone our whole population can fit in BKK and were still not enough to fill it) So I walked over to a tuk tuk driver, to get ripped off the first time. I showed him the address, max. 3 min drive (around 3 or 4 corners, 80 bath poorer). I stood in the front of the guesthouse, but the name wasn't right. Damn. I went over to the reception and asked if my buddy arrived. She let me check the sign book, but no Lu. Double damn! I described the lady how he looks, but just head nodding. Aiiiight and Triple damn! No idea where to go I left the guesthouse. I didn't know a bloody word Thai, nor I could read their signs. I looked around and spotted a small wooden flash with "Tawee" on it, the guesthouse Lu should stay. It was exactly behind the other guesthouse, hidden from the main street. I had to follow a small 2 feet-bright path. Maybe that Guesthouse must be a gem, because till you reach it, its very "un-guest-friendly", I thought. The Questhouse was a winner

Happy to see Lu was there, we cracked a first beer, took a little walk to Khao San as Lu played a little bit tour guide, showing and explaining me about this and that. We tried some dishes from the street vendors, bought some of the "neverseenbefore" fruits…. and so on.

Back at the guesthouse I pushed him to go to Patpong that night. Lu heard from a (western female!) friend that the supergirl bar has the best shows. Logically, as every first timer I wanted to see those smoke-beerbootles-liveshaggin-shows since I witnessed the first part of "Emanuelle". Another 80 bath ride (this time longer and in a air conned taxi) we arrived at the "Pong". Had the ugliest Khao Pat Kung ever ( we left the dishes almost untouched) so we went to check out the bars, but we newbies took the wrong turn and we landed in Patpong 3. Holy Mammamia, this was definitely the wrong place. Still today I had to laugh about the silly name from the first gogo in this soi "Golden Cook Boys"…..

Definitely not the style we want. Finally made it to the "infamous" Supergirl Bar. It was one of this dodgy upstairs places. Went inside, ordered drinks and tried to enjoy the show. But every 5 minutes the same chubby BG passed by asking me for a lady drink. Maybe she was retarded or something she asked me again and again. After a little while she get it that she didn't get it (the drink) and she starts pointing on the ceiling: "Sex show. Motorbike fucking..?" No clue what she meant, I put my attention towards the stage. Suddenly the lights went out and from the ceiling a huge bike with two girls on it, went down held by thick metal chains. Quiet impressive. I started to love Thailand. The shows was amazing. The girls (stunning!) worked on each other, one was wearing a huge plastic dildo shagging the other one form all different positions. After the Motorbike-Duo finished their performance. We paid and went to another bar, Superpussy was the name. What a crap. The show was almost non-existent and the next group of "ladies" who where dancing, weren't ladies at their birth. So emptied the drink, asked for the bill and BAMMM 300 bath "show fee". Ripped off again. We did what all newbies do, we paid and left. It was almost 2.00 and the bars went closed. What the f…. We didn't know about the crackdown, so we were in for more entertainment. A Thai guy stepped to us and asked. "You wanna Lady, sweet, good, I have best". We were suspicious but we followed him and denied to take a tuk tuk as he said "not far away". We followed him in a secure distance, cuz we went through side streets and small soi. I didn't felt comfortable but as we passed around the corner and entered a American diners tyled restaurant. I wasn't hungry, so we thought what the….. but then something unusual caught our eyes. The "Diners" had to many "Waitresses". We heard a clap (from the pimp) and around 20 ladies stood in front of us all wearing the same nice golden nightdresses. We were "flashed". After we made our decision, we found out we hadn't enough money with us to pay the asked 2000 bath each. Lazy ass I am we agreed that Lu is the chosen one to get the loot. 45 Minutes later he was back and we moved all to the a dirty, smelly ST-Hotel. Took a room each and the party started…. but just for me. Lu had bad luck and he took the "wrong" Girl. As he liked to start the performance, she complained: "Oh to big, hurt. etc.". So he only got a overpaid HJ… and a longer time of waiting in the smelly lobby. In the meantime I had a great time. We showered together, had a few laughs and 3 or 4 "action-scenes", it was just banging…. It looked like she wants that I have to use all my jummy hats before I leave the room, cuz always I (we?) finished she asked "One more?". She was damn cute, always a smile on the face and far away from the stone cold wham bam-bitches I knew. I was happy like a honey cake horse on Christmas and satisfied till the last cell. We get dressed, picked up Lu and his "girl". It was around 5 in the morning. We said bye to the Ladies, grabbed a cab and drove without conversation to the guesthouse. Lu pissed, me smiling the whole way. Another addict was born that night.

Stickman says:

Bangkok nightlife is just another on the long list of addictions.