Hell Hath No Fury
Hell Hath No Furry
By Khun Aeb Fung
I think I’m getting used to the supercilious sneers directed at me by those fat, arrogant farang cows, whenever they see me in Bangkok with my Thai girlfriend. They all seem to think that the reason why we prefer to have a relationship with Asians is because Asian women are so submissive: well I have just come back from Vientiane in Laos, just across the river from Thailand, and seen first hand what happens when a Lao lady finds her husband in bed with her best friend. Submissive they're not, believe me!
We were staying in the Saysana Hotel, in Vientiane, a lovely town just on the other side of the Mekong River from Nongkhai in Thailand. The hotel was clean but basic and good value at 500 baht a night, for the two of us. Luckily my gf is from Kalasin, in Isaan, where the local dialect is almost identical with Lao, as I don't speak the language. At 1 am, there was a very loud banging on the door of the room on the other side of the corridor that woke us up. When there was no response, the banging got louder and louder; so I shouted 'Shut up' in English, whereupon she went quiet, for about a minute. Then she called out 'If you don't open the door now, I'll kick it in and wake up everyone in the corridor'.
Still nothing happened and the screaming and banging went on until we heard the tinkling of broken glass: she'd smashed the glass panel above the door and pushed in some ceiling tiles at the same time. (I saw the damage the next day).
Then she screamed at her husband 'Someone told me you were coming here every night but I never thought you were shagging my best friend'. Somewhere in the background we could hear another female whimpering in terror. She'd locked herself in the toilet, to avoid the jilted wife. Then the guilty husband fled down the corridor, as his spouse was carrying a knife. I wanted to open the door to get a grandstand view but my gf wisely told me that would be a bad idea, as I could become a victim of the wrath of this profoundly upset lady and end up with the knife embedded in my anatomy.
With the husband gone, that left the lady and the 'mistress', the latter still in the toilet. Then the screaming continued 'I have always treated you like my sister and this is how you thank me by screwing with my husband: f… you, f… you! And to think I was confiding in you by telling you I heard he was having an affair; how am I going to face my family?'
Eventually the husband plucked up the courage to return and take his wife home, leaving the whimpering mistress in the hotel, to sweep up the broken glass in the corridor and we eventually went back to sleep.
The moral of this story is 1) if you've got a steady Thai partner and you screw around, do so very discretely 2) if you've got a steady Thai partner and you screw around, don't do it with her best friend.
So next time one of those monstrous farang women tell you Asian women are submissive, tell them they're full of shit. But we knew that anyway, didn't we?
The title of this article says it all. Yep, these Thai (and obviously Lao) ladies go ballistic when they lose it.