Readers' Submissions

Why Do We Do It?

  • Written by SiLeakHunt
  • October 6th, 2002
  • 5 min read


Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok


I’d really truly and honestly like to ask the question “Why do they do it?” but I can’t. I’d like to distance myself, I’ve got a good education, a sound work record, a promising future and an optimistic outlook but I’m scared of being accused of hypocrisy so I’ve called it “Why do we do it?”

I’ve got a mate, we played rugby at University together years and years ago, he disappeared I returned to my home in the North West of the marvellous United Kingdom of Great Britain. He fxxxed off to Hong Kong with his poncy degree in Civil Engineering, I went back to a scummy northern town with a “drinkers’ degree” and made a name for myself in the dynamic sales focused environment of “stitching folk up for a quid” my friend on the other hand made an honest living building railways in the New Territory.

He had a good lifestyle, the backing of a global multinational and a reputation for delivering on his word. I could sell sand to the Arabs and tell a blind man he could see (for a small fee).

During my weekends I’d go and visit the local “Shebeen” in fact I was my hamlets answer to Howard Marks, we’d talk about the perfect world, Nirvana, a place where you can pull, toke, drink, vomit and maintain a level of sanity.

“My friend you” as a lady who works in the entertainment sector called him, who put in sixty hour weeks and taught Philippino laborers how to shovel shit and make it level got offered a contract in Thailand and took it.

I, five years earlier. developed an interest in Muay Thai (a man’s got to take care of himself) and eventually managed to blag enough cash for my first holiday in Thailand. I made a few visits, he “filled his boots” for six months then settled down with a Chinese bird.

Eventually a mutual friend put us in touch with one another it was along the lines of “You know xxxxx has lived in Thailand for the last three years”

“fxxx off” was my reply.

“You know xxxxx is an accomplished Thai boxer and has been holidaying on your doorstep for the lat three years”.

“fxxx off,” my mate said.

Any road, emails were passed, dates were made, flights were missed and girlfriends were lied to and we both ended up on a night on the town (I was 5 time zones worse for wear, he was a hill tribe member of staff down).

The pair of us can both justifiably call ourselves “veterans”, he’s got more inside info than me, but when we met the last time I showed him places he’d never been.

Now I must admit it was a drunken discussion but we chanced upon the topic of “Why the fxxx do we do it?”

Personally I favor that Hollywood actor who says “I don’t pay women to sleep with me. I pay them to go home in the morning.”

My mate claims that it’s a matter of politeness and he doesn’t want to upset the seniors in his company.

But we raised a very serious issue. Neither of us would ever, ever, ever tell our folks that’d we’d even had casual sex (I’m going to write a piece called Catholicism and Condoms soon) with the girl down the road, yet we both freely and happily walk into bars, “cop a feel” as the Aussies say and disappear to a “convenient location” and return to the boozer an hour later satiated.

As Westerners most of us have been taught that sex is a sacred gift, but we happily forsake all that and treat it as a bodily function.

We’ve been taught to build special relationships, yet around a thousand of us board flights each day and head straight for Nana.

Some people back home say that even though it was a “trusting relationship” they’ve paid for a divorce (houses, rings and childcare) and done their sums. 1 years sanuking = six months in a western marriage and a lot more fun.

Some are just plain ugly (even though the ladies on Soi Cowboy disagree).

Others have had happy marriages, been true to their wives and come over to LOS for their swan song once all their commitments have been honored.

I can understand all the arguments I’ve just given, but I need to make this point. The ladies we engage ourselves with actually work as prostitutes, they get paid to sleep with men and we all fall for them.
I can already hear people getting up in arms, but I know the situation and I’m fully aware of what a “Mia Chow” is (paid wife). (hired wifeStick)

There are guys who meet genuine good Thai girls and have happy lives and I can’t fault them. There are guys who have superb relationships with out and out bar girls. One of my own personal best relationships was with a girl who worked in one of Nana’s most “notorious” bars and when she asked me if I had a girlfriend I replied, “No I butterfly”.

She said, “Is good at least no bullshit”.

Anyway back to the original question “Why do we do it?”

Personally it’s because they don’t get fat and want a Porsche. What’s your reason?

Send your answer to [email protected]

Stickman says:

So many reasons…