Readers' Submissions

TWAT – Top Whack Annoying Tourists

  • Written by Anonymous
  • October 3rd, 2002
  • 5 min read


Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok

By A Disgruntled Beer Garden Regular



After reading your article about Phuket girl prices coming down and having some experiences of the opposite nature here in Bangkok recently, I thought I would put finger to keyboard and give some advice to your readers holidaying or passing through Thailand, thinking about dabbling in some fanny…

Having been on the battle field in Bangkok, Pattaya and Phuket for the last 4 years, I'm well used to what one should pay for the girls and with what should you get for your money. From the 200 baht cheapies up in Chatuchak and on Pattaya beach, to the go-go girls vs. BJ girls in Patpong and Sukhumvit, to the 2000+ baht soapies. Together with my favourite pastime of drinking beer I have made shagging Thai girls my hobby in effect, and despite moving towards the 'respectable' Thai ladies of late, I have possibly been with every kind of freelancer, street walker, go-go girl and part time hooker slash department store lady in between.

Still being a fairly young lad I can usually get away with paying less than a thousand baht every time I go with someone. Go-go girls are often the exception to that rule but I rarely, if ever, have any complaints at a grand. Indeed, in 4 years I have NEVER paid more than 1000 baht for a girl from any of the bars. They know that I live and work here and they know that – as with them – 1000 baht to me is a relatively large amount of money. Especially on top of my sizeable beer tab for the evening and especially when you have to fork out 5-600 on a bar fine and possibly a couple of ton on a short time room if another bit is in your own bed at the time.

Recently though, many BKK lasses seem to be getting crazy notions of grandeur which I can only put down to repeated exposure to certain muppets who come over here for a two week stint or a business trip with pockets full of wads of cash. Having lived in Phuket I have always known what stupid money some love sick/sex starved guys pay when they come here – it frustrated us back then as the girls who had been our bedroom playmates throughout the low season suddenly did not look twice at us once November rolled round. In the last couple of weeks though up here in Bangers I have been refused more than a few times even by munters on the streets at 3am because they would not go for less than 1500 or 2000 baht!

To cap it all, last night I fancied a bird in Rainbow 2 and decided to take her home. Admittedly RB2 does have some very fine girls who can command high payments but it was 1.45am by this time and I thought I should be able to get her for my usual price no trouble. Being pay day I thought I would be generous and offer to pay the BF too… plus my usual 1K 'tip' for a short time stint.

Instead of seeing her turn up in her clothes ready for the off though, seconds later I was being laughed at by her and all her mates for being such a tight arse!!! Cackles of "Farang kee neow" and further insults were thrown at me despite the fact I had offered to pay a BF plus a K for only one or two hours just 15 minutes before closing time. I had to go over it again in my mind I was so stunned. What I had offered her was a lot more than I used to make as a qualified teacher in BKK! And it was nearly 2 o'clock in the frikking morning… I walked out with my tail between my legs, forced to shark the streets for a shag instead.

The fundamental problem I think for those of us who partake in the ladies to any respectable extent here is with tourists and businessmen paying way, WAY too much. And with them believing all the girl's BS about sick mothers etc etc and sending them ridiculous amounts of money when they return home. Despite the fact the girls are willingly working in the bars every night, getting pummelled by all and sundry.

I would like to say this to your readers thinking about coming here for a dabble with the fine lasses or to those who have already been here and think they know the crack after a couple of trips and now have some lass on their payroll: go for it… it's great fun… the girls are indeed lovely… get as many in as you can, while you can… but do not believe their hard-up stories, do not believe they are remaining loyal just coz you send them money and stop paying top whack when you take them from the bars! College grads only get around 10K a month here… perhaps 15 or 17K if they are very lucky… keep it all in perspective… a grand is a LOT of money to a girl who worked in rice fields before bonking for a living, despite what they tell you about high costs of living. Plus they almost certainly have 3 or 4 other sponsors besides you!! Don't believe it? Live here and get to REALLY know them… they'll gladly tell you stories of the daft foreigners who send them loads of money every month! Sure, you may have to pay more if you are fat, old or ugly, but paying silly money ruins it for those of us who live here and also for you if you ever decide to return and sew your oats proper. In Thailand, there's ALWAYS another honey twice as beautiful (and cheaper!) just around the corner.

Stickman says:

There are pros and cons for paying a lot of money. I used to be totally against paying any more than one had to, but in time I slowly changed, mellowed and started to see the girl's point of view too. With huge disparities in income amongst the punters from English teachers who think earning 30,000 baht a month is reasonable, through to executives netting over $US 10K a month, there will always be a difference between what the haves and the have nots pay. Having been a poor teaching, I empathize with you….but I would suggest that a better solution is to get a higher paying job, than to try and consistently pay low prices.