Laying motionless on the hotel bed half dead from the endless trip from America, it is midnight my head spins and the question. Should I go out tonight or wait till tomorrow? My body says go but mentally I am a vegetable. Perhaps this place I've read about Patpong is thinning out after midnight and not worth the effort. A brisk shower shower opened my eyes flashing images through my head of what Patpong might be like. Tomorrow won't due, Patpong tonight.
Armed with the do and don'ts from my Bangkok Guide book, I dash out into the street. Ahh, that must be one of those tuk-tuks. As I approached and said the word Patpong, the driver smiled and like a speeding bullet we were off. If the shower didn't wake me up, the whining of the tuk-tuk motor and acrobatics of the driver surely did. Why take a taxi when you can get the hell scared out of you in a tuk-tuk?
Staring down the Soi at Patpong as if in a coma, a jolt of electricity seemed to have traveled down my spine suggesting that I have struck gold. Between the chaotic crowd and seducing neon lights, I felt as a moth being drawn toward the flame.
Drifting past many a doorway wide eyed thirsting from the heat, I cannot bring myself to walk past the next. Looking up at the sign "Kings Castle 2" and then down again, a parade of ladies on stage waving me in with the motion of "ENTER THE ORGASMATRON". At this point I needed little convincing and entered walking on air.
My blood has always boiled when I see a beautiful asian woman, and now I can't seem to sit, walk or turn without making contact with many a doll. Within a short time I can't believe I am having to turn down advances of lady after lady. I couldn't dream of this in America even if I fell to my knees – begging – crying out PLEASE!
As the driving music and Singha reached my head, I fell into deep contentment knowing such feelings as I was presently experiencing are rare and would definitely be branded forever in my unwritten diary. Just about then, I crossed the border into the land of milk and honey. The Thai doll that I worshipped from afar for what seems eternity was now asking for permission to sit by my side. Her gentleness and unrelenting smile quickly had my heart melting into a puddle.
Back in America most guys have gone without a date for so long , they carry a picture of their right hand in their wallet (no offence to the left handers) and to now in Thailand control ones' destiny seems only to be a fleeting dream. I had no problem accepting that at least temporarily, I am alive I tell you – alive!
Even as I was enjoying the company of my chosen goddess, I had no control of my eyes wondering throughout the bar catching the attention given to me by other smiling ladies. It is now 2 AM, should I call it a night and relish a perfect evening or risk blemishing the perfection by continuing. Sweet MAY has easily convinced me to enjoy her company with a short time interlude to my hotel. With her hand scratching the itchy part of my back , how could I resist?
Laying in my hotel bed, MAY came rushing out of the shower shivering from the icy cold air conditioner of the hotel room seeking warmth from my bed and luckily me. She seemed very intent to kiss me to death as I explored her body with great appreciation. As we made love or had sex (who will ever know) she quite vocally was shouting a Thai word which drove me nuts because I knew not what it meant. Since her expression was hypnotic, I gathered the word expressed approval. She eventually left to go home or pursue another farang. This I did not care to know.
The next morning I laid in bed in disbelief of my first short night in Bangkok but got my act together to carry on with my trip as totally intended. After a week of such wonders as the Grand Palace, river trips, the ecstasy of Thai food, the wonderful people and 2 more trips back to Patpong, the thought of the trip home hovered over my head like a lead weight.
As I left Bangkok heading to the airport, it was clear that I had missed my plane because of the 10 mile long – 3 hour drive traffic jam. As I sat in the cab, I didn't seem to care because this gave me a little more time in a country that I did not want to leave. Read between the lines – home is where your heart is. I believe I'm a good example of loving Thailand for everything it has to offer, not just the angelic Thai women. The Thai women definitely begins to play a larger part the longer you stay but DAMN, Thailand is an amazing land that grabs on to you and refuses to shake loose.
I managed to peel away only the first layer of the onion on this trip. Who knows how many layers are left? But most certainly, layer two is waiting and most certainly it holds more than a few surprises.
Landing in America and then the drive home, I felt like an alien in my own country and with a sick feeling in my stomach setting my alarm clock to bright and early the next morning to continue my now changed life.
The above story is mine to cherish and as my first trip to Thailand should be complete fantasy without anyone telling me there is no Santa Clause. Just as the songs of the Beatles are timeless, so is this story for who knows how many lucky farangs that might read this say "Damn, he just told my story". You can't put a date, money spent or persons' age with this story for men for decades have permanently branded in their memories such trips. Oh the magic of the first trip with almost sheer ignorance of the reality of it. The trip back to the Bangkok airport wondering what in the XXXX just happened.
This trip was in 1995 and have made 3 more since, 1996,98,2000. Managed to get Phuket into one of the trips. Each time as I sit in the airplane on route thinking that I must be a fool believing that any future trips could even remotely rival the previous. Of my 4 trips I cannot compare them for each was magnificent.
Just for the record:
Before Thailand been to Hong Kong, Singapore, Bali and Taiwan as far as Asia. Also many, many trips elsewhere. I traveled to Thailand as a "where can I go next dilemma" and have now been disappointed that I didn't discover Thailand a lot sooner.
Would the magic continue after continuous trips to the bars week after week? Absolutely not. Would living in Thailand erase and change many of my original impressions of Thailand? Absolutely. Looking back, what are the top things you remember in your life? If you have been to Thailand and your a man , Thailand will surely show at or near the
top of the list. Its a well known secret fact that most men live there lives in quiet desperation. Thailand cannot buy you happiness but it surely can set you up to enjoy your misery.
Join the club!