Stickman Readers' Submissions January 30th, 2002

I Survived The Gauntlet

I was in Thailand recently for 4 days before going elsewhere in Asia for business. I spent most of that time with a 'good' Thai girl that I met on the internet. We had a good time, barely touched, but she took me to many nice restaurants and other places. I also met a couple of her friends, so it was a good experience for me to have a local to show me around.

During those first 4 days, I found most of the women walking with Farangs to be less than attractive. I did walk around Patpong after sending my friend home (she worked in the morning), and found the pressure to get me into the bars very uncomfortable and it pushed me away more than anything. I did peek in at some go go's from the Patpong night market and although there were attractive dancers, most looked dead to me, as if they had no life left in them. At the end of this first 4 day visit, my friend and I decided it wasn't going to be love, so we didn't see each other when I returned for another 6 days after my other business in Singapore was finished. During these 6 days I explored different places that I had read about on your web site. I thought since I learned so much from you, I would send you my impressions and some experiences.

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During this 2nd stint in Bangkok, completely unattached and not knowing anyone in town, my first evening I decided to visit a few of the bars on Soi 33, including Monet. After what you had written about Monet, I was surprised that I didn't find one lady there attractive. Also, I didn't get to choose who I wanted to talk to. Two women sat with me the entire time I was there. I left and took my curious self to Soi Cowboy. I went into Long Gun and watched some dancers, but couldn't imagine taking any of them out. When they would come talk to me all of their actions were so put-on and phoney that I knew I would just be 'serviced' if I took one of the dancers out. I know without real affection, it wouldn't be satisfying for me. I also didn't want to be with someone who was with another guy every night. So, I left and while walking back to my hotel 2 young ladies smiled at me and one of them was so attractive to me she just stopped me dead in my tracks. They asked me if I wanted to take the two of them. I wasn't into doing it, and I said that I would like to go with the one who I was so attracted to. We made our contract, and began to walk and talk. She told me she was in her second year at a Bangkok University and wanted to make some money. I checked her ID to verify her age. She was 20. She later told me I was her 4th Farang. She showed me her pinky, smiled and said she also had one Japanese man. Whether all this was true I can't say for sure, but although our agreement was short time, she spent 4 hours and was passionate, sensual, playful and curious. She literally examined every inch of my body – and cuddled for an hour or two seemingly fascinated with my chest hairs. It was just what I needed. We had great chemistry. I was divorced a few years back and hadn't been with anyone for a while. I took her phone number.

The next evening I checked out Chao Phya 2 massage. I didn't find the women there very attractive. I was about to walk out, but the one lady who was slender and seemed pretty was looking at me at pointing at herself. It obviously wasn't a 1 way mirror. Anyway, I wanted to experiment, but didn't want to have sex with a pro, so I thought that I would try a soapy. Supposedly, this was not the service these girls provided. The papasan said, "these girls for sex only", but I thought I could negotiate it with her, and I did. The papasan called her number, she came out and met me. But, after she appeared, if I could have backed out without her losing face, I would have. She was not as pretty up close, but more than that, she was a completely non-sensual person. I know this sounds strange considering she is a pro, but she was in many ways very innocent. We spent quite a bit of time talking. She had worked there for 4 months. She didn't know how to kiss. She told me when customers try to kiss her, she says, "no kiss". I showed her Farang kiss and a french kiss. She seemed curious to learn, but it was like kissing a little girl. I couldn't get into it. It was a strange experience and I liked talking to her more than the 'choukwah'. I asked her what she did with the money. She told me that she sent as much home as possible. I gave her a good tip and told her to put it in the bank – to save money. She gave me a very sincere wai.

The next evening I went to the Thermae. I was very curious and just wanted to chat up a couple of women and ask about the motivation for their chosen career. Seems like everyone sends money home to the parents, and that there is so much pressure within Thai society to do so, maybe making it the honourable thing to do, even if earned from prostitution. A woman who spoke English OK and seemed to be a down to earth normal person persuaded me to take her short time. I told her I didn't want sex. She said she could do a 'choukwah'. I had learned that word the night before. After she entered my room she just casually undressed herself. I could tell this wasn't going to be a passionate or really intimate experience. It actually became a rather comical one. I had purchased some massage oil at a local store in case this situation came up. I didn't realize that the oil had some kind of heat balm that totally numbed me. I apologized to her that this wasn't going to work for me. So we just took a bath and chatted for an hour. I asked her if she was looking for a Farang to marry. She said, "no more boyfriends or marry. I have baby, and we live with parents and that is my family." I found it interesting that she didn't want anyone to take care of her or seem motivated to change her life. She was a nice person and it was interesting to see the sincere respect she gave at one of the shrines that we passed.

The next evening I went to a bar in Soi Cowboy. I met a very attractive woman on Soi 23 and went with her into the bar where she was a dancer. We talked, and she pretended to like me in the most totally unconvincing way. She wasn't a very good actress. I told her I wasn't interested in taking her out – just was hanging out, but she and the Mamasan told me I could go short time for 1000 baht. More out of curiosity than anything I went with her, but it was very unsatisfying for me.

After the last 3 days of me choosing to be with women I wasn't really attracted to, I decided this was crazy. I called the college student and we had 2 more real fun days together. I took her the first evening to a very popular disco. She seemed to have a good time, but after a while she said, "Lets go to Thai disco". I asked her what was a Thai disco. She told me to trust her, she hailed a cab and we began to drive, and drive, and drive. It was further than Victory monument and not too far from the BTS. There weren't any English signs in the neighbourhood and I was the only Farang in the club. She knew a guy who worked there, someone from her home town also in school, so we got in for free. She was somewhat physical with me (things like putting her hand in my back pocket and dancing close). It surprised me since the Thai couples weren't acting this way. It was dark, but still her friend could tell we were not platonic. I said to her that we were the only ones touching, and she replied, "I probably shouldn't do it in front of my friend, but why should it be any different in Thailand than other places?" Anyway it was fun to hang out with someone much younger, who took me to completely non-touristy places. Even though she is luckier than most – having the kind of looks where she can pick out on the street who she wants to be with, I hope she doesn't get too involved with her new part-time job because at present she really knows how to enjoy being with a man and I'm afraid that might get ruined for her.

My last evening I decided to spend alone. I wasn't interested in forming any attachments. Anyway, I don't know if any of this is interesting to you or not, but that was the nightlife portion of my visit. For me, it was kind of an experiment.

Stickman says:

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This is the sort of story I like, someone who came to Thailand and who had a great time without having to go crazy with the girls. It is a reality check for a lot of us…

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