Pattaya For The First Time
This submission is from a non native English speaker and contains some
grammatical errors but they do not detract from the story itself.
Before I went to Pattaya for the first time, I became a member of a cosy inside bar on Walking Street through the internet. When I entered the bar I happily learned to know several guys with I chatted before on the website board and the cute bargirls. We greeted us and took some drinks to learn us to know. Well, I was tired the first evening and left early without any wishes to barfine a lady. A man stopped me before I left. He was an expat and a relative to the bar. I already knew him as a kind of guru of the website board. He said: "Hey Bulli, I got to know that Sue likes you." She was one of the Bargirls. "She said she likes your eyes. Really, I would try her. It's always a good sign if a bargirl offers her liking. She is really hot, you won't regret it."
Sue was standing in front of the bar to invite guests with a cardboard. The first thing I saw from her was her slender, cute body with a big tattoo on the back. Her hair was dye blond and her little clothes sexy. Apparently a well experienced whore, but not hardened at all. She overwhelmed me with her incredible smile and we chatted a while. I promised her to come back next evening.
She got my liking but I want to point out that I usually don't fall in love head over heels. I enjoy the company of a cute girl and act with a nice manner. But the cynics always tease me to be a lover. Ok, it's a kind of love sometimes but I always go for sure that I control the situation. After a workout in the gym I went back to the bar next evening. I like body building. Not really professional, but I'm a bit proud that my appearance is in positive contrast to the average tourist. And just in the mid 30's I can imagine that some girls fall for me.
When I entered the bar Sue rushed to me and wrapped her arms around me. We chatted and flirted and after a while we where kissing heavily and my hands searched the way under her shirt. She really knew how to drive a man crazy and I didn't hesitate to barfine her. We left to prowl around and to eat something. I could hardly wait to lay her down. I can only describe the night with her as a pure porn video. There wasn't a no-no. It was a pleasure for her to fulfil every wish of me. And my pleasure lasted till sunrise and included very private photos.
We slept till the midday and chatted and flirted again. She told me that she leaves Pattaya in 3 days for a new life. She worked since 2 years in the bar and had saved enough money to go back to her hometown. She wants to study english and become a teacher, she told me. She invited me to her good bye party to booze with her. Sue and me didn't use to drink much alcohol, but on her last party she wanted to booze with me because the leave-taking from her friends would be painful for her.
She left me in the late afternoon to start her work in the bar. I gave her 1000 Baht, that seemed to be the going rate for me and she was thankful with a wai. I was a bit sad that I would loose this girl so soon. Otherwise I was happy for Sue that her bar life had an end. I gladly recognized that we were two mature and equal persons in a mutual liking without talking bullshit. In the evening I entered her bar again. She happily jumped in my arms and we started the exchange of tenderness again. I barfined her immediately and she begged me to visit several other bars to say good bye to some friends. It was exciting. We were everywhere welcome and had a little party. Some friends of her cried to lose her, others were apparently envious. Sue danced for fun in a gogo bar and outshone all other girls, what made me proud to be her companion. The evening was moving and the following night in my hotel room was even hotter than the night before. Sue was an impressing woman.
Again she left me again in the late afternoon and with 1000 Baht. Damn, I liked that girl so much, she was incredible. But this time I had a strange feeling. Something seemed to be wrong. I couldn't identify it, just a kind of warn bells inside me. But it didn't make sense. She was 100% lovely to me. Maybe a warning feeling not to get emotionally involved too much. After a workout in the gym I had to dawdle away some time. I took seat in an internet cafe and posted about Sue on the board of The Bar. An interesting chat developed on the board with the bar members at home. Sue seemed to be a well known and notorious bargirl.
One guy wrote: "Sue must like you very much. Usually she goes all the night for a minimum of 2000 Baht. I can't understand it. Only reason is she likes you really." "Bulli, you are a cheap Charlie." Another one wrote. "liking or not. For this hard work she deserves more than 1000 Baht. You abuse her good nature." "Good nature? I know her better. She has no heart. I paid her 1000 Baht for a Short Time and she left me after 1 hour after her mobile rang. It's always the money, always." "Sue is very affectionate. But she pretty plays her games and does what she wants."
I was surprised how much action Sue caused on the board. Everybody agreed that the nights with her were like a porn video. Of course someone started the usual love discussion: "Don't even think that she loves you. It's impossible that a Thai girl loves a Farang. Maybe it's mutual liking, nothing else. Enjoy your time, but it's always the money."
Others protested that Thai Girls of course can love … bla bla bla, and it cannot be always the money. Even The Expat from The Bar intervened: "Sue is a professional in highest degree. We all had her and we all had nights like a porn video. But we didn't had her for real. Correct is she had us all! Bulli, you are just another trophy on her bed jamb. She has a little thing in you but don't expect too much of it. The guys are right, it's always the money."
I left the internet cafe with confusion. The bad feeling came back to me. Something was wrong with Sue. The feeling gnawed on my liking to Sue. But nothing seemed to make sense. I decided to test her liking. I wanted to prove Sues intention and I wanted to show the other board members that I can reach something what the bald, fat cynics only dream of. And that money is not everything.
When I entered the bar in the evening Sue jumped as usual in my arms. We kissed us and took seat at the bar. I bought her a lady drink which she comforted a long time as usual. I told her with all my tenderness: "Sue, please don't be angry. Today I don't barfine you. I like you so much but I am just at the beginning of a long holiday and I cannot pay you 1000 Baht everyday. I am afraid to run out of money if I go on like this. But I like you, believe me."
She pressed her cute body to me and smiled: "I can understand. Don't worry. I like you too and want to spend the evening only with you. Money no problem. I just want to be with you." We kissed us again and cuddled us all night long in The Bar. I was overwhelmed again. She really gave me all her attention without to expect any money and she even bought me a drink. One of the other bargirls always cried bitterly when Sue looked at her. She left me then to comfort her. She used to wrap her arms around all other bargirls and then went back to me. The most time she spend with me and sometimes we kissed so heavily that I lost contact to the reality and explored her body with my hands. It was a funny view for the other guests and The Expat smiled. He seemed to be glad with his match making. I wished Sue had come to my hotel again to fulfil my plan complete. But I had understanding that she wanted to stay with her friends in her last nights in Pattaya. Late at night I went to the hotel alone and was sure that Sue really liked me. I must admit that my heart was beating for her. Not in a stupid loving way. I always beware to control the situation. She was just an impressive woman.
The next day was her good by party. I bought a little present for her. Nothing special, a perfume for 300 Baht, nicely wrapped with a ribbon. I happily entered the bar with my best clothes but Sue didn't jump in my arms. She even didn't pay any attention to me. She was working on another customer and treated me like air. I was absolutely disappointed. It's her party and she is flirting with a new customer. What should I think now? It was a riddle. I took seat at the bar and The Expat talked with me.
"Bulli, you cannot be angry. It's all like I always say on the board. She is working, it's all about money. You know that and cannot be angry. There is no love in the girls, and I even doubt if there is a liking."
"I'm not angry," I lied, "I'm just disappointed. It's her good bye party and she has no time for her guests. I can't understand her. Why does she work today?"
"I don't know," he responded, "forget her. You will never understand Thai girls."
We went on talking. I told him about Sues plan to become a teacher. He laughed out loud and said: "Sue a teacher? Hehe. I don't know exactly but she never wants to study English, that's for sure. As far as I know she has a lover in England. Most likely she goes to marry him. English teacher, hehehe!"
I watched Sue working on the customer, who didn't seem to be very interested. But she didn't stop that and one time she gave me a gesture to be quiet. Ok, she didn't really matter to me, but I unusually ordered some hard drinks and tilt them quick. The expat and other guests asked me to do a bar prowl. I agreed and left the present to a servant behind the bar. We visited several gogo bars and entered at last The Expats favourite bar. The boss welcomed us with a pot of sangria and I got drunken without intention. My thoughts circled around Sue. At midnight I decided to go back to her bar. I wanted to see her a last time and to know if she really simply dropped me. I left the guys and went back. I ignored the Katoeys on Beach Road smiling at me or cursing me jumping out of my way.
I saw Sue and her friends sitting in wicker chairs of a beer bar in front of The Bar. A bottle Johnny Walker Black Level was on the table. When Sue recognized me she jumped up and hurried to me to wrap her arms around me. She was speaking like a waterfall.
"Oh Bulli! Thank you for present. I happy. Come have a drink. We make party now, ok?"
Apparently she felt uncomfortable. She knew I was angry. She pushed me into a wicker chair and mixed a whiskey coke for me. Than she sat down on my knees and clung on me. Strangely I felt funny. I really couldn't be angry at her. Tomorrow she will be gone and I will choose another girl and tonight I just want to play with Sue. That is all, just a game. I pulled her into my arms and we kissed again. I was so drunk and confused, that it didn't disturb me that I was sitting on Walking Street and kissing like crazy with a hardcore whore. When I stopped kissing to sip on the whiskey I opened my eyes and I looked around to see people staring at me. The girls, the tourists, the flower and photograph sellers crowding around me. I saw it through a haze as if it wasn't real. You always see Thai people watching you. The cigarette sellers and motorcycle taxi drivers with their friendly smile. Every Thai who has something to sell watches you with a smile. But sometimes a Thai between them watches you without a smile, someone who has nothing to sell. I recognized this Thai staring me on the other side of the road. His face didn't show any emotions but expressed that he wouldn't hesitate to kick somebody in the teeth. My view caught his cold eyes a while, then I focused back to Sue. She smiled and we continued to cuddle and booze. When the bottle was empty the girls asked me to go inside their bar. The Expat and the other guys had returned too. The girls seemed to be in a strange excitement but I don't know anymore, I was too drunken. In the bar Sue urged me to barfine her. I realized that other guys rumoured about that, that this wouldn't be the behaviour of a bargirl. I ignored them and just said 'okay'. I thought to myself 'I fuck you the brain out bitch'! I gave her the barfine and chatted with the other guys. The bargirls seemed to have a serious discussion and they were running to and fro in and out of the bar. Then Sue came to me and gave me back the barfine.
"Sorry Bulli," she said, "I cannot go with you. My friends angry when I finish party."
I could hardly control my anger. Now I realized what was wrong with Sue. She wrapped me around the finger all the time. If I hate something then it is to be wrapped around the finger by a woman. I'm very sensitive to feel this and my alarm bells warn me always. But Sue was just to professional. The alarm bells didn't work well. She was too good. I tried to keep calm and said: "Okay. I have to go now, I'm drunken. Goodbye. Good luck."
I left her alone and went out of the bar. But she followed me and stopped me on the road.
"Bulli, wait," she said, "I want you to know that I really like you. We will never see us again, but I never forget you. Believe me, you have been important to me."
She took my hands and smiled truly. I couldn't smile to her anymore, but I said: "I like you too, very much. I will never forget you too. Good luck for you. Take care of you."
"Take care of you." She responded and I turned around to go. I didn't look back but I was sad. I think she really liked me like I liked her. But liking has no value in Pattaya. Surviving is the priority for the girls.
During my holiday I learned to know a lot of bargirls in Pattaya but often my thoughts were with Sue. I wondered about her strange behaviour sometimes, what didn't make sense. Only after I was at home the expat told me the whole truth in an e-mail. He wrote: "Bulli, I tell you now something that you couldn't know. Before you came to Pattaya Sues life was chaotic. She had a Thai boyfriend who could hardly accept that Sue leaves him. He was a dangerous psychopath who terrorized Sue and even the Bar. Just in the night before you arrived he came into the bar and caused a lot of trouble. He shouted for hours to Sue and slapped her. His friends supported him and tried to provoke the few guests. Surely, Sue had a little thing in you but at first she needed you as a kind of bodyguard. Just for the case that the things go worst with her ex Thai lover. That's how it works here. Never trust in the liking of anybody."
There are 1000s of "Sue"s in Pattaya, and indeed all over Thailand. This story represents well that for these girls, while they may find you attractive and even quite like you, they are still working girls. It is only in precious few situations that genuine love will blossom.