Did I Miss Out On Love?

I've been going out to Thailand since the '70s, so I'm now one of the old, fat men mentioned a lot on this site, not yet bald, in fact still got a full head of hair.

This particular trip started off on the aircraft, when the passenger next to me began to all and sundry, that her and her husband had booked together but he was sat on the row directly behind, eventually a person sat next to her husband said he would exchange seats with her. Why didn't I? She never asked me if she had I would have done so. She just had to go mouthing off to all around her, if people haven't got the courtesy to personally ask me then I don't listen.

The gentleman she changed seats with was a large bearded gentleman called, let's see Robert will do, and it was inevitable we got talking. He was going back to BKK to see his girl friend. I'd been a couple of times before and was therefore learning about Thai bargirls.

We landed and said our goodbyes, that night the usual happened I picked up a girl in Patpong, there was no Nana complex in those days, and she was useless. The same happened the next night, the third night I thought A-ha tonight should be alright, it usually takes three nights to get the type of girl I'm comfortable with. This third night I decided to try Soi Cowboy for a change. I wandered up one side and down the other, having a Vodka in the ones I went in, beginning to feel tipsy I decided to stop at one bar that had a counter in front and some stools and sample the food they were selling, i.e. hamburgers, hotdogs and chips etc.

I'd nearly finished when a voice behind me said "Hello How are you tonight?"

I turned round and saw a large man standing there swaying slightly, I replied "Fine" and turned back to my food, the stranger moved to the stool next to me and said, "Don't you remember me?"

I stared at the man and was just about to say no, when he moved his hand over his chin and said "Just imagine a beard." Of course it was the bearded man from the plane now sans beard, I asked him what had happened and he said his girlfriend didn't like it, so ever obedient, off it came.

We sat talking for a while, then he asked if I had a girlfriend, no I told him relating the past two nights.

"Come with me", he said "I'll introduce you to one at my girlfriend's bar." He explained that he really liked this girl and the previous night she'd gone with a man [nationality not mentioned to avoid a flame war] who'd treated her very badly.

So over we wandered to the Honey Bar I believe it was. I was introduced to Robert's girl, a real hard case if ever I saw one, in fact while I was there I saw her send a man out and join him a bit later and watched them go to a room opposite.

The girl he introduced me to was called Bai [not real name] and she was lovely, she was quiet, due mainly to not having much English, but enough we could manage a conversation in Tinglish. She was a charming girl and stayed that way throughout my stay. She had a female falang figure and her skin was a lovely golden tan colour.

As I inferred above I bar fined her that night and she stayed with me till I left the country. In all the visits I have made I have never met such a kind hearted caring person as Bai. She never asked me for anything no gold, no dresses no jewellery nothing.

As you can imagine I was really falling for this girl, a few more weeks there and I would have married her. But the holiday finally ended and we said our goodbyes. In the hotel on the final night we said we would write to each other, we exchanged photos. I told her that if she wrote for money I wouldn't send any and it would be up to her whether she would continue to write. I told her I was just an ordinary man and had to save all year to come to Thailand.

She said not to worry she wouldn't and would look forward to my next visit. She came to the airport with me, and never asked for the taxi fare back. I thought I was on to a good thing.

I met Robert at the check in and got a seat next to him. He said it had been a terrible trip, he'd found out about his girl and had gone down to Pattaya and butterflied the rest of his holiday.

For the next few months Bai and I exchanged letters, in August I wrote and told her that I would be back in November and gave her my flight and time of arrival.

The next letter was a letter asking for money as she had to have an operation and as we know there are no free operations in Thailand. I wrote back saying that I had told her that I would never send money as I knew even in those early days some girls had numerous amounts of money being sent.

One night I had a phone call from BKK, but I was out. I had a friend who was a Radio Officer on Tankers and he had a wife and house in BKK and only came to UK, when in need of a job. This trip he ended his contract in UK, and was just waiting for his flight to Thai, so I wrote another letter to Bai and gave it to him, when he returned and told me what had happened I was devastated.

November I flew to Thailand and the first night I went to Soi Cowboy and the Honey Bar and asked to speak to mamasan, I asked her where was Bai, she called out and a girl came forward, "This Bai" she said.

"No" I said and took a photo from my pocket. "This Bai" she looked at it and her face went white.

"Who are you", she asked. I told her I was Jeff from London. "Just a minute" she said and went rummaging in her handbag. She came back with a letter addressed to me. Bai had got someone to write for her, in it she said that she felt that we wouldn't meet again and looked forward to the next life when, she hoped, we would be together.

Yes the obvious truth was she had wanted the money for an operation on herself, never got the full details but it was something to do with her stomach. She died lying on a trolley in a corridor in a hospital. Because I hadn't believed her I just went with the flow

So to end, you have to take people on trust, for these twenty years I wonder if I had sent her the money would we be together still.

I realise there are many bargirls and others that have numerous farang sending money each month. I would say to these Falang say no a couple of times and see if you hear from them again, if not, you'll save a lot of money.

Stickman's thoughts:

Ouch! But seriously, these girls cry wolf so often that they simply cannot expect the average Western guy to believe their stories any more.